Our Pathway

24 Months- Happy Birthday Liam!!

2011-10-06T14:36:00.007-05:00

An Honest Moment. . . .

There are days when I feel like Liam's been 2 for years, when his infancy seems so far away that I often feel like the past two years have been a big blur. Then there are days when I feel like I deserve a metal for having survived the baby stages and days when I well up with tears over not having appreciated his tininess enough. So goes the every tugging and pulling emotions of motherhood. Constant ups and downs. Times when you don't think you could possibly love anything more to the total opposite emotion of you wanting to pull your hair out when you are tired of him screaming and whining at you which subsequently spins you into reminiscing about the times you were BORED without a child. Then there are the emotions that make you constantly doubt yourself. Is he eating healthy enough, is he learning enough, am I exposing him to enough, does he know already how deeply loved he is? Questions upon questions. Really, am I controlling how this child will develop and how he will learn and love others. As mothers, parents really, we do mold them completely!! Talk about pressure. Once these feelings start welling up inside me, my heart jumps in well the holy spirit and says "Just love him and love ME and the rest will fall into place." And so I continue to love him unconditionally and fall back on the idea that I will never be perfect but I can be perfectly in love with Liam. Oh the journey parents take on. Thank you mom and dad for doing it for me!

Liam news. . . .

Liam is officially 2! I guess I can't keep using his age in months as my blog title anymore. We have had a rough week thus far. Liam caught his first stomach bug. His first sickness really. Nothing more heart wrenching then watching your baby throw up and not being able to fix it for him when he asks "mommy, go way" as he points to his throat. Translation: Make this burning go away in my throat! Rich and I stayed up most of the night getting him settled and well. After 24 hours he bounced right back, but it sure wasn't fun! Then he passed it to mommy! Oh joy! But we are on the mend. Note to self: don't let your child drink a lot after he or she vomits. SIPS of liquid only. Hello!

On Liam's actual birthday we took him to the zoo. We took him on his 1 year birthday and decided to carry on the tradition this year. The pictures above are a comparison of his first year birthday and this year. He really has grown. He liked the zoo too this year. Although the animals didn't interest him as much as pushing his stroller, throwing some mulch around, and playing on the playground. Oh well, there is always next year. We followed up the birthday with dinner with the grandparents. We even Facetimed with Aunt Say Say so she could watch Liam open the present she sent him. A HUGE play tent with balls. Thanks Say Say for the messy toy that takes up my whole living room. :) Meanwhile we are planning his big party for Saturday. It's Toy Story themed and outside at my parents house. We have a big blow up bounce house, corn hole, coloring and chalk stations, and a bonfire for smores. The weather is going to be great so we are excited for him to enjoy a big outside party. I'll be sure to follow up with pictures.

Liam is starting to want to use the potty more and more. I haven't quite dove into it because I want to get Sarah's wedding perfectly planned and over before Liam needs all my attention to go potty. That and the big boy bed are waiting until the holidays. I've had a lot on my plate lately and I don't think I could handle all that right now.

In other news, Liam officially knows all of his colors. Anything you ask him he can tell you exactly what color it is. I'm pretty impressed myself. We need to start working on the ABCs now. It really does pay off to just talk to them constantly and tell them things as you do and see them. They do listen! I'm loving that he is communicating more and more. He can really tell me what he needs although those terrible two moments sure do sneak in. The screaming and fit throwing wow! I just try to stay calm and get him to express what is upsetting him and if all else fails, time out happens. It does work actually. And he says he is sorry and we move on. Learning to discipline is another hard part of mommy hood. But learn as you go and keep loving. I will keep that as my motto through this next year of his life. Nothing is as bad as it seems right?

Bring on the terrible (yet Fun) twos! Happy Birthday to that little piece of my heart that walks outside of my body! I love you Liam!

22 and 23 Months TRANSFORMED

2011-08-25T21:21:00.009-05:00

Liam continues to make me smile with how much he absorbs and changes. I do have a really smart kid I'm sure of it :). He's so observant and even now watches us when we are telling a story about him to someone else and makes comments at the end. Below are some of my favorite moments from these past few months. You hate to ever forget them...

Right now Liam Says "hold You" when HE wants to be held.

Tonight 8/25 we took him out of the bath naked and he was brushing his teeth when he said pee pee and we sat him on the toilet. He didn't go, brushed his teeth and again he says pee pee and we put him on and he WENT. He asked and actually went @ only 23 months :). Proud moment! Since then he has continued to want to sit and flush and will occasionally go. He is getting there. I'm not pushing him I just occasionally ask and always have his potty available in the downstairs bath.

Right now he repeats everything we say even my big sighs ughhh. He spilt water on accident I rushed to get a towel and he said UGHHHH with a big sigh because he knew I was going to say it! He mimics everything. We have to watch everything we say including GEEZ and SUCK which I will no longer be saying. TIME TO watch our words!

Liam also grabbed Lulla's tail tonight and said wee wee ;) after which I had to describe that her tail is not a wee wee.

He is definitely starting to play with his people and toys like they are alive. Calling them names like Amy (his new crush @ church) Making them jump and run etc...

He is starting to make sentences. He ran to me in the laundry room and asked for his B (blanket). I told him I was busy and that his blanket was upstairs in his bed and that he needed to go ask his daddy to go to get it ;0) clever right. He ran from the room "Da-yee Day-yee". He ran straight up to Rich and said. "B stairs (pointing to them) up, please". Completely took my command and explained it to Richard. That was so cute.

This past week at church I taught his Sunday school class. There was a little fight between two babies and one ripped a book from another child's hands. Liam went straight up to the little girl who was mean and shook his finger at her and said No No. I hadn't Liam use the word No until then. It was funny. The he raised his hand and rubbed her head after that. I though oh no, is he is going to hit her? No, he rubbed her head almost as if saying "it's ok that you were mean but next time you need to be nice. Since that episode he has seen the little girl and as soon as he saw her he pointed and said MEAN. He was telling me that was the mean little girl. HA! I will have to try and explain to him that she's still nice.

In the past two days everything is prefaced with an "I" and a song. "I clean, I clean" (the kid loves to clean) "I crazy, I crazy" (from Gabba) and we have just taught him "I cute"!

He knows almost all his colors. We practice on M&M's which he calls m's. He can point to each color and tell me what they are.

Update: Our days our mostly filled with outside, garage playing, visiting grandparents, napping, eating, and watching NEMO at the moment. Trying to occupy an almost 2 year old day is TOUGH. I always feel like I may not be doing enough for him but I'm doing my best and that's what is important. Got a few busy months coming up. Consignment sales, his BIG BIRTHDAY, Sarah and Chad coming in town and then the BIG wedding not to mention holidays shortly thereafter! :) Busy Busy. Just glad to take a few minutes and write some memories down!

20 and 21 months!

2011-07-19T20:40:00.011-05:00

He's a big boy now. That's the only
way I know how to describe him. Over the past two months we have experienced so many new things. We've been on vacation. He has discovered a plethora of new words and is just such a joy to be with. Over the past two weeks has he really turned his own language into words. He started his baby jabber again and now it is full blown words. It blows me away to hear him out of no where say broccoli or Maggie or face, just the most random words that I've never heard him say are coming out daily. He is learning how to be more independent and for the first time this weekend he played with his friend Maggie alone in her room. They were sharing pretend food and carrying on conversations. Laura and I even caught them hugging and kissing :). It starts early! :) It just so surreal to see the baby become a boy.

He's really gotten into his night routine more and more to. He requests a book after his bath now and before his nap and although it is the SAME book he wants to read, he refuses to go to bed without reading it. As soon as we are done he waves good bye to the book and gives Richard and I each a huge hug, Eskimo kisses and a kiss on the lips, and then asks to get BUP as he calls up into his bed. We sing him our song and then our prayer, he gives us both high fives and off to bed he goes. I've been telling him things in bed right before I walk about about what he has to look forward to the next day. He smiles and repeats it back to me and more often then not in the morning he wakes up remembering what I've told him and asking for it. So smart. In the mornings he has resorted to calling for us each MOM MOM MOM MOMMA, DAD, DADDY repeated times till he realizes we are coming. His whining has slowed down some because he isn't as frustrated as he used to be because he has the ability to tell me a few things now. Yes, my high maintenance child is becoming a little more manageable. I say that with utmost love. He isn't one of those laid back children who will go with the flow. He is a high maintenance never slept well active busy needs attention kind of baby. So now that there's a hint of independence I've feeling more refreshed :).

A few fun thing's he is doing now. . . .

He is saying AHHHHHH after sitting comfortably or drinking something. Like he is refreshed and replenished.
He has started using Richard's IPAD for all his games. He uses it like an adult, clicking the home screen button, picking his games out of a folder, and playing the ones he wants then going back to the home screen to pick out another one.
He loves to Picking out colors. He does great with Yellow, blue and red. And he loves to go into our closets and pick out shirt colors.
He still is into drawing and using his markers and has really taken up play-dough.
Richard and I starting leaving him with each of our moms two days a week. He really enjoys his time getting spoiled by them and Rich and I enjoy the break.
He's really into jumping off anything really. He will dance when he hears music and is still obsessed with having a Popsicle here and there.
He still eats ANYTHING and EVERYTHING and will on most days take at least a 2.5 to 3 hour nap.
His bedtime is around 9 usually and he wakes up like clockwork around 7:15.
He loves to be scratched and often times asks for he leg, arm, or back to be scratched.

I'm attaching a few beach pics from our big vacation. Although it was great to see all the family it was TOUGH with Liam. He was an angel on his first flight though. We left later in the evening and he was great on the plane. I bought a few new treats each flight and he had fun playing with each new toy. Thank goodness it was only an hour flight. As far as him being at the beach it was hard for him to adjust to 13 people, new big twin bed, time in the sun, and just a new schedule period. By about the 4th day he was getting adjusted and settled and then two days later we left. He was really whiney and boy it wasn't much of a vacation but I was thankful to be with those I loved and I have just resorted to knowing that vacation with babies is just relocating with a prettier view! :).

I can't believe we have a big two year old coming up. Looking forward to a toy story themed party (since he LOVES ALL THINGS BUZZ and WOODY) and Sarah's wedding in November, which we are all planning! :) Till next time, and hopefully I'm not behind.

19 Months

2011-05-30T15:50:00.005-05:00

Hose Time

Liam's curls and temper!

Liam is about to turn 20 months next week. 20 months sounds so old. Pretty soon we won't be even counting by months. It seems like I always say this but I'll say it again. He grows a little more everyday. His words are a new everyday. His reactions and his emotions are new. I'm really starting to know him as a little boy and not so much a baby. :( It so strange but I can barley remember him as a baby and that wasn't to far back!

In Liam news, I think we are breaching the terrible twos. Not so much the terrible twos just the I wanna do everything myself twos. He is so independent. I don't have the laid back child that will go anywhere, entertain himself, and just be chill. He is the total opposite! He is learning what he can throw fits now in hopes of getting his way. He has been in time out two times. Cried the entire time :( but understood exactly why he was there.

I asked my 19th month old to not hit mommy when he gets angry and that when he was done in time out he could come say he was sorry and give me a hug. Did I expect him to understand any of that, no but when I told him he could get up the first thing he did was walk right up to me smile and hug my neck!! Tear right! He understands so many things. I feel like he is a little advanced but that could just be because I am biased :). I've figured that time out will be a decent method for me. Until he grasps what he has done fully. Time out before spanking. I am having a hard time when he hits me telling him NO HITTING and then spanking which is hitting him. It seems so contradictory, so we will try time out until he is old enough to feel threatened by a spanking.

Little things come to mind this month. He loves to be outdoors more and more. Loves to pick up the cicadas that have invaded us! YUCK! He loves to play in the water and will play with the hose for hours if I let him. His hair has even started to curl up in heat, which mine does too! So cute and so blond! He really is a very loving boy. Always wants to hug everyone. He will say your name hug your neck and turn to the next person in the room, say their name and hug their neck. He repeats the hugging at least 10 times.

He has become obsessed with Toy Story 1, 2, and 3! We bought him his own Woody that he loves and the second he wakes up he asks for BUUUU which I have found out means Buzz. Just the other morning Richard tried to put him in bed with me when he woke up, he threw a fit and kept pulling my finger saying MOMMA. He wanted me to get up. I always ask him to tell me why he is upset and he looked me dead in the eyes and said WOOO, WOOO, with such intensity. I said do you want to watch Woody. UH HUH with a yes shake of his head! :) He is grasping so many things. I've decided he can understand anything I tell him but he can't communicate what he needs in return. It will be so nice when he can finally get it out. He gets so frustrated some times which leads to those fits I previously mentioned. Patience is really a virtue with a toddler.

For my own record. I've found that explaining everything to even a one year old really helps. Constantly pointing to objects to tell him what they are, explaining what I am doing step by step, telling him I am leaving the room to do a certain task but will return, really does help him understand. He now points to what he wants and doesn't get upset at the things he would have before. It really helps to explain things to them show them things and talk to them. They aren't to young to grasp what you mean.

He is still doing ok with his sleep. He is taking 3-4 hour naps during the day! I know it's awesome! Depending on his nap he sleeps from 9-7:30 or so give or take a 30 minutes. He is still eating really well, everything in site and more often than not will side for his broccoli and green beans over anything else on his plate. He still loves popcycles and the occasional dumb dumb.
Overall his newest behaviors are his fits :) and his way of communicating and believe it or not this age is getting cuter and cuter!

In other news our remodel is almost done. We laid new floors, painted every baseboard, redid our stairs to hardwood completely (WORK), painted the bedroom and a few closests, got some new furniture, and are slowly starting the fun stuff, decorating. I can't tell you how stressed I've been for over a month with my house in shambles. It feels good to have my head above water now. Hoping to get everything decorated and settled this week. Rich and I leave for IKEA tomorrow. A day trip just the two of us! Looking forward to it. Until next month.

A little late....18 months

2011-04-20T15:33:00.006-05:00

A few weeks late on this update. It's so hard to keep up with how fast he changes. I think between his age and 2 years old things happen at warp speed.

Liam's last doc appointment went well. I want to note, for myself, that he has all of his teeth. He has had them for about a month. So at 17 months my child has all his teeth. That is until he hits 2 or 3 for those last set of back molars. Can I just say HALLELUJAH. I thought we would never make it through teeth. Especially when he would get 8 at a time! He is 34.25 inches TALL for his age and 26 lbs. He is still taller than all the 2 year olds we know and although he is just as big, you can tell he is lacking that 7 to 8 month coordination that his older friends have. It's quite comical to watch. Jumping, running, climbing, and rolling are all apart of his daily routine. Oh and boo boo's are more and more common as he learns these new found skills he has. IMPROVEMENT: The constant whining has slowed a great deal. He has learned to communicate by pointing, using his words, and dragging me, by the finger to show me what he wants. He's even learned to drag other bi-standards out of manipulation when momma says no :).

His words increase daily. MOMMA still seems to be his favorite word. It seems like a broken record at times but everyone comments on how sweet his little voice is and how sweet it sounds when he says it. His Momma does really come out with heartfelt love!

He is still greatly obsessed with Bubbles, Balloons, and now sugar free POPS as he calls them. He also loves to say ON. Everything needs to be ON. The vacuum, which he uses once a day, the lawn mower, the tv, the computer, the phone. Everything is ON! Some new words are Pop, up, cup, down, blank (blankie), book, look, ttttt (truck), SH (shoes), dog, moon, star, and my new favorite PLEASE. Oh I have been coaching him on that for months and finally I asked him if he wanted something, said "say please" like I always do, and when I looked down at his face he said PLEASSSSE with a tiny lisp. Oh how it melted me. We cheered and clapped for him and he thought he hung the moon! He did a little dance and everything. Wow, he could have had anything he wanted that day. He is great about using it to now too.

He is still eating well this month and rarely turns down any food I give him. He is still sleeping good and usually still takes 1 long nap 2-3 hours a day unless he gets up to early and then he will take two. Momma likes the one LONG stretch of a nap but I can't be picky right? He still uses a bottle to go to sleep with at night. No pacy, no boob, but yes bottle. It's hard to transition a baby you've nursed for 12 months every night before bed. We had to do a bottle since the pacy was obsolete with him but this too will pass and he will grow out of it. I plan on breaking him of the BA BA right after our beach trip. He needs it for our NIGHT flight to NC.

He is hysterical when he puts his finger over his mouth and says SHHHH. Where he got that I'm not sure. He still loves to play peek a boo and will jump up from his crib in the mornings and yell BOO Momma! :) His new favorite outside love is the lawn mower. Anything outside really but Boppa took him for a slow ride in the yard on his lap and now he is hooked on getting at least one ride in on a a pretty day. Ah, the little things and yes, I still find myself doing just about anything to keep him entertained.

Right now our house is a disaster and with Liam it is even that much more difficult. We are pulling up all old flooring, carpet/laminate, and laying beautiful dark flooring. It's amazing how it transforms your house and I've needed a pick-me-up and it's doing the job. I'm having to push aside my inner self, the OCD clean house wife, and look at the final picture. Hopefully when it's all said and done that final picture will come complete with new furniture, new decor, freshly painted baseboards and trim and a whole new look for our house. It's about time!

I wanted to mention the destruction because this week Donna took Liam for the day while I was ripping up carpets and pulling nails upstairs. Although I didn't get to have a day to myself relaxing, I actually did have the first full day EVER to myself. I was so anxious about it at first but it definitely was worth the anxiety. I learned that yes I can have a day to myself and feel ok about it and yes I can feel like my old self! Where have you been old self? Hiding? Ah, Rejuvenation is key! I might just have to try that once a week! :)

This is a busy week in our house, Easter, Sarah and Chad coming, house under construction, and more but I'm thankful too! Thankful for a husband I get to be with daily, a wonderful family that loves me unconditionally, the excitement of my little boys face when he OHHH and AHHH's over the smallest things, friendships, and a savior that died for me, one that has forgive my transgressions! :) Happy Easter!

17 Months

2011-03-10T14:35:00.002-06:00

I can't believe I'm already due another blog post. Well what isn't there to say about Liam...so much is changing daily that it is hard for me to keep up. He can just about grasp about anything I tell him to do now. He is getting into anything and everything out of simple curiosity and I'm actually going to have to start coming up with things for him to do maybe some sort of daily activity (craft time, reading time, food time, nap time, outside time) something because this child is getting bored and so is his mother. Sometimes the days DRAG by! It doesn't help when you have one day of 65 degree whether and then a day of 45 degree weather. Outside inside outside inside. I'm ready for hot days of sprinklers and time outside.

Right now Liam is cutting 8 teeth! Yes, I said 8! Four molars and four eye teeth (the worst I hear)! He has had the low grade fever and runny nose thing for a week now. I'm associating it with the teeth. They are no FUN! His nights have been a bit messed up too because of it. 1/4 tsp of dimetapp the doc says for conjestion and some tylenol for fever. The kid has lived on it for a few days! This to shall pass right.

Liam's vocab these days (Momma, dada, boppa, nonna, CeeCee (cindy), Kis (Chris), ouch, UH UH (uh oh), shossss (shoes), Hat, hot, bubble (perfectly), house, ball, tteettt (teeth), brush, STUCK (my fav whenever he is in precarious position), boooonnnnnn (for balloon, his favorite and yes it is drawn out like that), bane (airplane),

He still blows kisses, gives great hugs, kisses on the lips when he FEELS you deserve it, falls asleep in his carseat (never has since infancy), loves to try and jump, is testing me some with hitting for fun, gets his feelings terribly hurt when someone other than mom tells him no, loves to color (boooonnnsss of course), loves to put car keys in the doors to try and open them, did I mention get into EVERYTHING, loves runnning and running naked after his bath, and his newest venture throwing things down the stairs ex: his whole sock drawer one sock at a time! Needless to say I've learned to let go of a lot of my analness, is that a word! If he isn't dying or bleeding right ;)! Life of a stay at home mom!!

I'm posting a few pics of this little guy! ON to next month....my big one and half year old!

In other news Rich opened his real estate office offically, Regal Realty Group!

16 Months

2011-02-07T15:16:00.008-06:00

I really feel like this post should be titled discovery. It seems like Liam is discovering something new every day. Something new to get into that is! I guess that is how it is at this stage of life but it's really enjoyable to watch.

Right now he is cutting four molars, two top and two bottom. Still sleeping really well and generally goes to bed between 8:30 and 9. He usually will sleep 12 hours and has cut himself down to one long afternoon nap. I like having the long 2-3 hours break during the day. Although I wouldn't really call it a break. Today I mopped, did two loads of laundry, picked up, emptied dishwasher, paid the bills, did my yoga video, and am actually writing a blog while watching the snow come down like crazy! Squeezed in a lot during nap time today.

Back to Liam, he is really into balloons right now, or BONS as he calls them. He loves to find them in books and draw them. He also is making the cutest elephant noise whenever he sees an elephant or hears the word on TV. It is so cute. He constantly says Momma, which still melts my heart every time. He says it with such love. It really is sweet and I will cherish it now because I know soon enough it won't be said with such sweet sentiment. He still gives me and occasionally others Eskimo kisses but mostly mom :). He also says a new word almost everyday and still loves his blanket, or his BA, for bed :).

Our hiccups are still the bottle for bed time and the nursery situation. I'm not going to stress over either. Liam has never taken the pacifier. He soothes himself to sleep with some juice in his bottle. It was the easiest way for us to transition after a year of nursing. Yes, I know it is a bad habit and bad for teeth etc, but it works and we will slowly ween it off. But after having no sleep for a year, I'm not about to ruin what I've got going. The nursery thing will work itself out too. I have to be down there anyway and am ALWAYS needed do to lack of volunteers and the new baby BOOM. So he will eventually learn that I am down the hall or will be back. I'm learning not to stress so much and just go with what works. My new advice for new moms. Do what feels right and go with what works for you two not necessarily the way everyone else says it needs to be done.

He's growing so fast. I'm sure he is at 25lbs now. He was 23.14 at his last doctor's appointment and is 33 inches tall. He is taller than most 2 year olds we know. I have a feeling when we double his height at 2 he will be breaching 6 feet as an adult. Tall like his daddy! :) We've also got him on a great shot schedule now. I feel more in control. If you look over shot records and timing you will see that babies don't need them all at once and most shots can be put off months or even years. Doctors just like to cram them all in. So we took the two at a time approach and he will be done soon for a while.

Our new outing during the week, usually twice, is to Pump It Up in Mt. Juliet. It is a HUGE warehouse full of blow up kids play areas and he loves it. It is free for children under 2 years old and from 10-12pm is toddler play time. It has been a great way to get his energy out during this snowy winter, and I have gone with a few friends too. Liam always has a great time.

Well that's about it for me and Liam. Richard however, is staring a new real estate brokerage and being backed by a few investors. He's going to have his OWN new office in Mt. Juliet and we are earnestly praying this will be successful and a good move for us a family. Just praying the doors continue to open like they have! It is one exciting new adventure for my hubby.

Till next month........

15 Months

2011-01-02T14:10:00.007-06:00

We are almost at the 15 month mark and on to the new year! 2010 was full of life with little man and full of adapting to being parents! Thankful we made it this far, ha!

Liam had his second Christmas last week and he really did enjoy himself. His favorite part was passing out the gifts mainly all to his Boppa. He didn't quite understand why there were so many gifts and was quite overwhelmed with all the toys but we kept him at bay and he behaved well until nap time! Next year I am sure will be quite a different story!

Liam continues to keep on his same schedule. He sleeps 9-7 and takes two naps a day early morning around 10 and late afternoon around 4. I like the predictability. :) He is cutting new teeth, molars I am pretty sure and has recently had runny nose and cough. We have still yet to figure out his eye/eczema allergy. I was thinking it was wheat and Dr. Don said it was was well but without wheat it sill flairs up. I'm hoping to switch pediatricians soon and get this figured out! It's been the most frustrating thing not knowing what is causing the skin under his eyes to flare up. It could be an endless amount of things. Hopefully an update on that soon when we go for his 15 month checkup. Which I need to schedule, man I am terrible! I put it off because I dread the shots :). We put off a couple of his shots so he doesn't get more than two at each visit. I just don't think it's fair to make a child have more than 3 shots at a time. I could hardly handle that. So they had no problem putting them off for me most of them aren't required till the child is 3.

As far as overall health, Liam up until this date has never been sick. I'm not counting the runny nose from teething that we battled with an elevated bed, suction, saline drops, and humidifier as sickness so we've been blessed. But just these past two days we've been battling a cough. Going to call the doc tomorrow but he has no fever and a runny nose. I'm sure it's his teething. I can feel two teeth popping through and I see many more coming. With my luck he will have 5 or 6 at once like the first round. He has had this top and bottom 4 for what seems like month. So I know he's really hurting from new teeth. Hoping it's drainage from teeth. Going to reelevate the bed, pump the humidifier, let him take 1/2 tsp of honey to coat his throat, a steam bath, and last but not least some vicks on his feet with socks :). These are the mommy remedies I've found. We will see how it goes.

Liam still says Momma and Dada all the time but his favorite word is still Boppa. He currently loves "The Fresh Beat Band" on nickjr and any form of music! He loves bubbles and still seems to love Momma the most. He's playing shy again from everyone but has his good and bad social anxiety moments. His most recent act is to make me notice his Boo Boo after he gets hurt and have me inadvertently kiss whatever it is that he hurt :). So sweet. I can tell that within these next few months his vocabulary is going to double. He tries to say so much! :)

Still enjoying mommyhood, more and more the older he gets! Trying to focus on our goals this year and get moving, exercising, growing Richard's new real estate brokerage, writing, and being the best mommy for Liam. All Lord willing that is! :) Happy New Year!

14 Months

2010-12-03T10:51:00.003-06:00

So much about Liam is changing. He continues to capture our hearts with his curiousness and delight. There really is nothing like viewing the world through a child's eyes.

Liam continues to get himself on a pretty good schedule. Still eating any and everything three meals a day plus snacks. Sleeping about 10 hours each night and still taking two 1 to 2 hour naps during the day. I like the predictability. It's nice for a change. This past month we have accomplished the unthinkable. Liam now officially goes to bed and takes his naps without being rocked. We literally lay him in bed with his milk or juice, but hey it's still on his own and he goes to sleep without crying. This is a HUGE step for us :). He will talk himself to sleep or play sweetly in his crib and I truly think it is due to routine. I started putting him in his bed before being rocked only at night to tell his "animals" goodnight. He has about 5 in his bed with him. We did that every night just for bed and before too long he would just lay himself back with his milk and blanket. I would sing a few songs to him and slowly leave the room. Then we tried the day naps once he got the night time routine down and he did it without hesitation. Now my son BEGS to go to bed. He starts to get fussy and we ask him "Liam are you ready for bed" to which he shakes his head YES, makes for the stairs, climbs them and reaches with both hands whining to get up in his bed. It's AMAZING for me and Richard to know that yes this child can sleep all night and yes he can put himself to sleep. We worked a year at this no sleep crying thing and it has paid off :). Thankful but in a since sad the rocking is gone.....

Liam also has said Mimi this week and truly understand just about anything I ask him. He really has caught on to MOMMA and says it with such intensity that it melts my heart. I just love hearing it from his lips :).I think he's smarter than the average 14 months old, but I am biased :). Next we have to tackle nursery and getting him to feel comfortable enough there to be left. One feat at a time!

Going to bed on his own has been our big feat this past month. We also put up our Christmas decor only to discover Liam loves the BALLS, as he calls them, on the tree. Our tree has ornaments about halfway up and is empty below. Maybe next year will be a bit better. Just going with the flow on this and not putting out as much this year.

Trying to keep Liam occupied this winter indoors is going to also be difficult. He is into everything and so BUSY! My mom bought him a fisher price small slide that we are keeping inside that he loves but other than that and taking him to stores, I'm out of ideas. He is just at the age where he wants to explore but it's to cold out. Guess he will be bundled up and play outside or we will just be bored and survive till spring.

Life is continuing to pass us by. Another year coming right at our heels. Thankful for this past year and the lesson's I've learned about myself and my family. Praying for new opportunities and doors to be opened and praying for a healthy safe and happy new year for all those I know and love.

13 Months.....

2010-11-03T17:04:00.004-05:00

13 Month Update

*Sleeping 10-11 hours at night 8:30 or 9:00 to 7:00-7:30
*Eating any and everything included popsicle's.
*Saying more and more words including Momma, Dada, Boppa, Bye Bye, Booty :), Ball,
*Weighing 22 lbs and 31.25 inches
*Take two naps a day ranging 3 to 4 hours total
*Walking fast paced and completely standing from sitting position
*Reaching for hugs and to be picked up constantly
*Copying momma all the time with cleaning etc.

Quick update. . .

My One Year Old!

2010-10-13T15:08:00.007-05:00

Can't believe we made it already to the one year mark. We just celebrated Liam's first birthday this past week and had a great time doing so. Tuesday, his actual birthday, Richard and I took him to the zoo. He had a great time being outside and especially enjoyed the playground area for babies of his size :). I think we will definitely be getting a membership next year. That night we had both of our parents over for a tiny celebration.

Saturday was his big party. We had about 25 people to Cherry Creek Clubhouse and had a great time. Liam's party was "train" themed and I took the time to make all sorts of banners and small touches with trains. You'll see them below. I bought 50 colored balloons, which were Liam's favorite, had subs fruit rotel and pasta salad, played a a video of Liam's first year that I made and had a great time with friends and family. Even Sarah got to come in and we were thrilled over that! :) Liam behaved perfectly :). It was a special time just as I had imagined it would be. I'm so glad I took the time to prepare and was proud of myself (which I never say) for pulling it off :).

As far as this past month, when I wasn't consumed with planning, Liam hasn't changed to much. Although we swear he is getting more hair but I think we are just telling ourselves that. He has started to express himself more and more with his voice trying to say things, babble if you will. Not to much developmentally has changed in the past month. He is really into putting tops on things and putting small objects behind and inside things. He also mimics certain things I do for ex: this morning I was vacuuming inside the couch cushions and he followed behind me with an attachment doing the same. I can tell he is going to be mommy's helper for sure. He also starting giving real kisses just last night. He pokes his lips out and Richard was thrilled when he got, yes count them FIVE in a row! :)

His sleeping is really improved. I can ALMOST and I say ALMOST count on him to sleep through the night. Ever since I stopped nursing him at night, nursing period, he has slept! WOW, next baby no milk products for me! Weaning has been easy to no issues with me. I'm glad I made it a year but now I know for next time how things will pan out! Back to sleep, a perfect night for him is 8:30-6:30 although he still wakes up and wants to go back down an hour later. His morning he slept 8:30-5:30 back down at 6:30-8:15. Every since I've stopped nursing he has changed. GO FIGURE. My child was allergic to dairy I know it. We are still having trouble wit his "exema" as the dr. calls it under his eyes but when we go in next week I'll ask again. Overall I'm starting to feel a bit more like my old self. More organized, on top of things, even feeling a little inspired lately. IT feels GOOD.

We are loving the new changes each day brings. So thankful to have Richard home with us. So richly blessed. Link to pics of party.

http://www.facebook.com/#!/album.php?aid=2119303&id=52701664

11 Months and We have a WALKER!

2010-09-05T16:52:00.005-05:00

Already 11 months old! I can't believe he will be a year in less than a few weeks. This past month Liam has completely fallen into his personality. He still is the observer and views his surroundings and those in it to a tee. He is starting to not like it when he gets his way and has now mastered the yes and no head shake to tell me what he wants and doesn't want. He also claps and plays patty cake on command. I often hear him wandering screaming "da da" as he searches for Richard throughout the house. I haven't heard any new words other than his normal jabber but he does know exactly what a ball, an apple, a drum, and a hairbrush are. He even will brush his hair. I must say that he is a smarty :). He entertains everyone with his smile and really is the happiest little guy.

He has become pretty independent too. He still LOVES to retrieve his apple out of the fridge himself and will carry it around effortlessly while taking tiny bites and speaking of bites, he hasn't yet turned down ANYTHING I put in front of him. He loves to EAT ANY AND EVERYTHING, veges and all. I am blessed in that sense and I really think it's because I have always offered him such a variety from the very beginning. My mom did the same with me and my sister and we are the farthest from picky eaters. So I am glad Liam has followed suite.

Right now Liam's favorite toys are his big ball and anything the plays music or he can shake or bang to make music. He has become of fan of himself and what he can do :). He loves to push and throw his ball around effortlessly and bang Boppa's drum. That ball is what got him crawling and actually I think it is what helped him start walking too. Yes, he is a WALKER.

At 11 months 5 days Liam started walking, out of no where. On Wednesday he had been using his ball to stand up with and would stand for 5-10 seconds on his own. We thought that was a big feat. Then on Thursday he stood on his own and took one tiny stumbling step to the floor and boy did I think he was brave then. But then on Friday, I stood him up and asked Richard to grab the video so I could catch him standing and low and behold he WALKED 6 steps or more to me in the living room. We were floored and you can tell my our reactions on video :). We had no clue he would do that. He hadn't even mastered standing on his own. It just happened so fast. So now he is pulling himself up and taking 15-20 steps at a time and walks more independently but still results to the crawl because it gets him where he wants to go faster. I must say it is so cute to watch him toddle around and sway back and forth to keep his balance. :) I'm proud of him although I know this means my life will soon change. I'm just blocking of the areas I don't want him to go and letting him roam.

He also loves to play horsey and will push my back forward grip my shirt and jump asking me to hoist him up and let him ride. He also has gotten into "Love biting"! I am pretty sure it's his mouth bothering him but he won't bite anyone but me. He will squeeze me and then bite me almost out of excitement but I am pretty sure it's because of his teeth and hopefully it won't last long!

I haven't had to face any major disciplining yet. He knows the word no and does get his feelings hurt when I have to use it. He is obsessed with turning over the dogs water bowl. I will catch him within inches and he glances around making sure the coast is clear or else he has a guilty conscious and then he goes for it and dumps it everywhere. He loves to splash and play in it! Man it's a mess but I'm sure it's a stage and positive it is just one of many messes.

Liam has just recently worked into a decent sleeping routine. We had to let him fuss a few nights to put himself back to sleep but he's pushing his wake time to 7 or 7:30 which is awesome. So we are hoping he keeps it up. He still wakes up around 4 occasionally but I'm so used to sleepless nights that it feels routine. I think that has been the hardest part for me is the lack of sleep. Totally makes you feel unlike yourself. But hopefully with this new pattern and him walking more he will sleep better. I can hope right?

I recently took over Nursery Assistant at TDF. I feel like that's where I need to be and where I am most of the time anyway. Liam still has separation anxiety but we are working on it. I figure the more we are there the more he will get used to it so that I can sneak out randomly.

Other than that Liam is the joy of our life. Parenting is one challenge after another but all worth it when he kisses your face and hugs your neck. We recently did some spring cleaning, dejunking, and I am planning Liam's train themed first birthday :). We are excited to be with friends and family, especially Aunt SARAH, and celebrate his day! :) Till next month.

Last Dr Apt at the end of August: 20.1 lbs 30.25 inches long! 85% for height 20% for weight! Like father like son! Oh and we still don't have much of any hair. I looked back at videos of me 4 months older, its uncanny how much he looks like me, than him and I had a Lot of dark hair. So crossing my fingers it starts growing like crazy in the next few months!

10 Months

2010-08-07T13:13:00.008-05:00

I can't believe we are only two months away from Liam's first birthday. I always tell people that some days fly by and some pace like snails but when I think about a whole year ago it does seem to have gone fast. The only time I get to sad about it is when I look back at pictures and videos of when he was so small. Jessica had Sophia this past week in the room beside the one Liam was born in. Holding such a small baby definitely brought back memories. Although I get saddened sometimes, it is so exciting to see what he will do next.

Liam is now very mobile. He has yet to walk but can pull up and cruise on just about anything. You will see in the pictures that he has become quite the adventurer. His new favorite word is UP and he will use it often as he heads towards the stairs. He loves to sit on the steps and will be content forever doing just that. He still has the one legged crab crawl as I like to call it, but I'm just waiting for the walking to come any day now. I know he will walk before a year. He tries to stand up on his own often falling on his face and will stand for a few seconds before he decides to sit down. It won't be long before my world is turned upside down with a completely mobile baby.

Right now he is cutting 5 teeth. Poor baby and poor momma! We've had a few rough nights but have survived with some pain killer and a lot of nursing. So thankful I still am able to comfort him when he's hurting. There were a few days there when he wouldn't take a bottle or anything but me. I was thankful then yet again for nursing!Speaking of nursing. He has yet to be sick ONCE, thank GOD! I know it has all to do with nursing, my humidifier each night, plenty of fluids all day, and care. We are thankful. He is going to his next doctor appointment in two weeks. We are a little behind on schedule.

So when he's done cutting these 5 teeth, he will have 7 teeth. He hasn't needed those teeth to eat though. He is eating just about anything soft I put in front of him. He will eat anything! Vegetables he seems to LOVE! We aren't seeing any signs of pickiness at all and are thankful so far.

His words now consist of "da da" "UP" "ba ba" and I think we are even adding BOPPA! He only will mumble MA MA when he is really upset. But hopefully it comes soon.

He is developing his personality more everyday and just this morning discovered he could clap :). We've been patty caking all day :). I think right now he has my personality with a bit of Richard. He is pretty laid back and sensitive and is very quiet and observant. He always has been. He is a sweet baby boy!

He loves to play in the refrigerator, dishwasher, cabinets, stairs and anything he can get into! We play choo choo in the laundry basket and he now loves for daddy to chase him. I pray I can remember all these times.

Our problem areas are still revolving around SLEEP. By sleep I mean lack there of on some nights and problems napping without needing to be nursed. He recently has refused the pacifier, maybe because of his teeth, but it sure is difficult to get him to nap now without it. Where he used to be able to be held with his paci, now he screams. So we are working on nap time. I have been successful so far today. I just have to be consistent.

I'm also trying to focus on weening. I am really trying to nurse 3 times a day and next month want to cut to just 2 times, morning and bed time and then in his 12th month we will just do night time feedings. The problem is he still wakes up around 4 or 5 am and wants to eat. He nurses and goes back to sleep. SO I am not sure I can drop that feeding until he sleeps a bit better. A good night is 8:30-6:00 without one awakening. We have been thrown off lately with these teeth and him waking up once or twice at night. He wakes up around 6 and wants to go back to sleep an hour later and then takes two more naps during the day. I just wish he'd get more out a night. I just keep telling myself that this too shall pass and I will feel normal again with sleep. A lot of people have told me that after they stopped breast feeding they felt so much better and more like themselves. I am hoping for that. I am ready to definitely feel more like myself. I still feel like I left my brain somewhere else. I feel like so many moms just get this parenting thing like it's nothing and I find myself struggling to keep up, find myself, and find time with Richard without just wanting to sleep. Just seems like I'm surviving right now. Guess that is how it goes most of the time. Praying next baby is a sleeper and when I say next baby, I mean three years away next baby!

Other than surviving :) and loving on my baby life is good. I am thankful. This baby boy is changing daily, I am learning, and I can't wait for the next stages. We are going to the beach again a week from Saturday and hopefully Liam will like it even more now! :) Exited to see what he thinks about sand second go around. Excited to watch my LIAM!

9 Months

2010-07-06T10:32:00.002-05:00

It's hard to believe he's 9 months. I probably say that every month but he's only 3 months away from being a year. I must say he's getting to be so much fun. June was a HUGE month for Liam developmentally. He learned to say "da da", which he has decided not to say since, he has learned to sit up from laying down, stand up from sitting down, walk while pulled up, and crawl. His crawl in hilarious. He keeps one leg underneath him and pushes off the with the other. I call it the crab crawl. He is ALWAYS smiling and has only recently been getting clingy right when he gets into a different situation. He adapts pretty well though. We have also started him on people food. He adores green beans. He is still eating oatmeal and fruit for breakfast, but at lunch I try to give him real fruit, lunch meat, crackers, sliced soft vegetables and maybe a sweet potato baby food every now and then. He does great with eating tiny bits of what I eat. I never thought he'd be doing it so early but he is and hasn't had trouble yet. He still isn't sleeping all night. One night he will sleep all night and the next he will wake up randomly around 3 or 4. He has gotten into a pattern of sleeping till 7 though, which is nice and he does take two naps a day, a long morning nap and late afternoon nap. He's pretty by the books right now. Just developing his personality. He's thrown a few fits when he doesn't get his way but I've started saying NO NO and he immediately stops and looks a me funny. It's hard not to smile. He sure does love his Mimi. He squeels for her everytime he sees her. We took him to the beach at the end of June. He loves water of any kind and did great. The first thing he did was put sand to his mouth, of coarse, but he quickly realized that wasn't for him! Other than that he is a happy baby. We are still exclusively nursing and go for our 9 month checkup next week. I think he's around 20 lbs now and as long as ever. I've got a precious sweet baby. His demeanor is much better than I expected and he is always happy. Here's to another month!!

8 Month Update....

2010-06-08T15:53:00.002-05:00

Liam turned 8 months old this past week. It was a busy week with mine and dad's birthday too but I had to post an update on Liam because he has changed so much. In one week he decided to belly crawl or scoot if you will, pull up and stand on his own, and say his first word, "da da"! Of course Richard was ecstatic that that was his first but I wasn't surprised because I constantly would say "da da" to Liam repeatedly. We are working on momma too :)! It is just so sweet! He wants to get into everything and at this point is just frustrated that he can't get to where he wants to go. He only belly crawls when he desperately wants too so he gets easily frustrated. I just know that as soon as he moves he will be gone and life will drastically change. He loves to be outside more and more. I've bought him a swimming pool and swing that we hung from mom's tree. He loves it and has even fallen asleep in it. Just today he decided to put his face down in the water. He seems to love the water which I am glad of. He is still nursing about 4 times a day. Morning two times after breakfast and after lunch and then at night. He is still eating stage 2 baby food but I'm looking to slowly giving him more people food in the next few months. He is just changing daily. Loving to see all he can see and share in everything. We go back to the doctor at 9 months to get a checkup and next Friday we head out to Memphis for our first road trip and then to NC to the beach for a week! Hoping that goes well with baby in the car for a long time, but we will survive. Well that's just a quick update on baby boy. :) Oh and for my own notes, I'm officially back to womanhood :( my period came back this past week.

7th Months....

2010-05-18T17:59:00.003-05:00

Liam is developing his personality. He is such an observer and boy is he getting to the point where he wants to move so badly! Everything he sees he grunts at. It's a grunt of frustration and intent. He desperately wants to get to things but has yet to figure out how. People have told me to enjoy him not moving but I really want him too. He will be such a happier baby when he can be somewhat independent. He is still wanting Momma and has a bit of stranger anxiety. We broke our second tooth through this week. He has done great on his sleeping. His pattern had been to wake me up every three hours. After ruling out eating to much for gas, not eating enough, teeth, spoiling, and or everything else we just decided that it was either all of the above or a stage. He now is taking two naps a day. One mid morning for an hour and a half and another the same late afternoon. He is still going to bed around 8:30 and he wakes up in between 6-7 for his first feeding and will usually go back to sleep. We started him on a few puffs this week. He has done ok with chewing. It's funny watching him but we will slowly introduce that. He has also loved having oranges and apples in his mesh chewie. I must admit that I'm nervous about anything that might choke him but we are working on that. He's doing great at sitting up. Gets a little wobbly still but otherwise is doing great. He will get up on all fours and rock back and forth with means to crawl but succumbs to his belly. He can rotate 360 degrees though and can roll with a vengeance! :) He is getting so big! No words yet unless you count "hi". Which I swear will always be his first word after he woke up at 4:00 a.m. to his glowworm and said HI outloud! :) I will count it at least!

Things are going well. I'm starting to contemplate when to stop nursing. I just don't know that I'm producing enough but I want to keep the one year goal in mind. I've lost so much weight. I almost feel like I look sickly. Hopefully going to gain some back after the nursing stops. I'm tired still but who's not when they are a mother. It's definitely getting easier, but it's an adjustment that's for sure. I was telling Deb Mynster today that I can't wait to get back some pep in my step and start doing things that I used to love to do. I must admit that at times you feel like you lose yourself in so many ways. But it's worth it when you see his face! I'll find me eventually until then I'll just keep loving on this boy and living by my motto "one day at a time"!

Remember this....

2010-04-29T21:04:00.002-05:00

Well I actually have five minutes to myself. Long enough to sit and type. I must admit though that my mind is elsewhere. Isn't it always elsewhere when you have a baby! My mind is already passed washing my face and teeth and is sound asleep in bed. It's funny how I still feel like after I put Liam to bed I need to go to bed myself because I am still never sure what to expect at night. The past week he has done great. He has gotten into this awakening habit once a night for me to roll him to his side. He gets stuck on his belly and doesn't cry for me once I flip him over and he goes right back to sleep but I will be glad when he stops that. Lugging myself up 16 stairs, and yes I count to keep me awake, is hard when you were sleeping oh so good! So here I am distracted thinking about bed but I wanted to mainly post an update. Liam has his first tooth in. I can't remember if I blogged that or not but Motrin, Homeopathic teething tablets, and gripe water have been great. He's done well once it initially broke through but I am dreading a mouth full of these things! He also is trying to reach and move on his belly. Maybe crawling soon. Everyone says oh you want them to not be mobile because then you are exhausted. Well I'm already exhausted and am ready for him to be a little more independent. So I've decided that I'm going to enjoy each stage. I wanted to also write down a few things that I have really used, loved, and needed during his first 6 months.

*Onsies, onsies, and more onsies.
*Long pants/shorts with elastic waists comfort!
*Zip up pj's especially when they are little and you change them at night you can't see those buttons for anything!
*PLENTY of burp rags and bibs. Enough for the first few months of endless spit up which goes away at about month 5 and then bibs for food.
*Mesh netting food holders that Liam has loved for frozen fruits and ice especially while teething
*Boppy for nursing/not supporting him while he sits
*Plastic spoons/bowels/now sippy cups
*bouncy seat/although he doesn't use it now it saved us for 6 months
*johnny jumper/he still loves it
*Saucer
*NUK pacifiers only ones that he loved
*GAS drops/prune juice for constipation
*Bathtub for him/ still in it sitting up!
*Cooler holder to go for babyfood/juice

Those are just to name a few for my record mainly! I also posted one of his new pics from his 6 month shoot! Well update at 7 months! :) Hopefully a first word and maybe a crawl! GOODNIGHT!

6 Month Checkup

2010-04-13T21:20:00.003-05:00

All is well after baby boy's 6 month and 1 week checkup. He is doing great. And just in the past two days has really mastered sitting up! :) It's so cute how in tune with the world he is. Everything and everyone he passes is an opportunity to touch, smile, and interact. He weighs 15.14 lbs and has only gained 2 lbs since his last visit. He is in the 22% for his weight and 75% for his height! Tall and skinny, yes!! He is doing great she says and looks perfectly healthy! We can introduce puffs and more solid like food once I am more confident in him sitting up alone. His laugh continues to melt me. Just for my notes, Liam is having 4 tbs of rice cereal in the mornings with a fruit (Gerber First foods). He has a vegetable at lunch and rice cereal again 4tbs at night with a half a fruit. We are keeping a good schedule as far as three meals a day goes and he loves frozen bananas in his mesh net food holder. He nurses still about 5 times a day. Hoping he drops the 5 am feeding soon! Ever since we let him scream through his midnight awakenings he has slept until his early morning feeding. As painful as that was, it worked! Yes these are all random thoughts and notes but I want to remember all I can for the next one! :)

6 Months

2010-04-02T10:58:00.003-05:00

Liam has changed so much from month 5 to month 6. I am starting to love this stage. I've decided I am not so much a newborn person as I am this age. I love that he is starting to interact. This month he has started on rice cereal and baby food. We have slowly worked into a morning cereal with a fruit, a vegetable for lunch, and rice cereal and a fruit again for dinner. I must say it's hard to know what to do about introducing baby food but he loves it. He did go through a stage where he would wake up a lot at night. It was probably due to the new food and because he is a little, well a lot, spoiled. He loves to be held and rocked to sleep. So we are working on that too this month. Putting him down awake. He will slowly get it. If there is one thing I have learned it is to follow the ques of your baby. You will learn his or her personality and likes and dislikes even this early on and you just do your best.

Liam is the most smiley baby. I have been told that about him since he was born but he truly is. He smiles at almost everything and anybody 24/7. His dimples make everyone melt including me. He is also starting to giggle out loud and oh how sweet it is. He hasn't sat up yet, but is almost there. He does although roll completely and sleeps on his belly at night now. It seems like he wakes up a different baby every morning. Richard and I always ask him every morning if he grew up during the night. He is just such a joy. His sleeping patterns are getting better. He is sleeping from 8:30 to about 6:30 now and that is great. He wakes up every once and a while but such is life. We will get there.

More and more I've realized that just when you have them figured out they go through another stage and change on you again. It truly is trial and error day by day and that is frustrating but rewarding. Richard and I are head over heels and can't wait for his next stage!

Into his 5th month....

2010-03-11T15:55:00.002-06:00

Well Liam is changing daily. Truly his attitude and personality are changing day to day. I can't believe I can love something so much. He loves to look and absorb everything around him. He recently been grabbing faces and trying to grab and put anything and everything in his mouth. He is still enjoying rice cereal with a touch of apple juice and is talking and laughing more and more. He smiles at everyone. I love this stage he is in. He is still a little leery of men if he is fussy but then again we don't get out much. He loves using his legs and walking from one person to another, with help of coarse. He is starting to suck his thumb here and there and has recently had to cry himself to sleep bc he is a little on the spoiled side. It was heart wrenching for me to listen to him cry but he has to learn to put himself to sleep if he wakes up without mom at his side. So we are learning and growing. I'm learning daily how to handle this new role. It's hard but rewarding! We are dedicating him on Sunday.

Almost 5 Months

2010-02-25T08:37:00.006-06:00

I can't believe my boy will be 5 months old next week. Time sure is moving but I'm enjoying every minute of it. I have found out that I love babies but I love this age he is in. I love that he is starting to be aware of everything and smiling at everything. He is becoming so much fun to be around. We went to the doctor last week. He did great. He weighs 14.1 lbs and is 26" long. He is in the 77%tile for his height which means that only 23% of babies are taller than him and he is in the 22%tile for his weight which means 88% of babies are bigger than him. He is one tall and skinny boy! :) The doctor said he was the perfect example of a lean breast fed baby. She said she sees so many overweight babies and he was a great example of what babies should be :). He had his third set of shots and didn't scream at with the first but boy did he scream with the second.

He is constantly changing everyday but lately he has is able to grasp things even better. He now reaches out for things in front of him and will sit in his saucer and push buttons and grab for the toys in front of him. If I play with something in his saucer and then leave it he reaches and plays for it right after me. He is laughing now too which is precious. He loves to laugh when I scare him. He can hold his neck up so well on his belly and still hasn't accomplished complete rolling over from back to belly but can roll from belly to back. He is eating a little rich cereal too and loves it. He cries if the spoon isn't in his mouth. He is also getting a little attached to mommy. We are together every day all day! He prefers women too and gets upset when men hold him! Different stages. Lately he has woken up at night which he hasn't done in forever. I think it's the teething or the cereal he's now getting. I hope he figures it out soon because it wears me out!

This mommy thing gets easier each day! I'm thankful for my wonderful husband who helps every second he can and thankful for a beautiful healthy baby boy!

My BIG 4 month old. . . .

2010-01-29T16:30:00.004-06:00

Liam will be turning 4 months old this week, and I'm so excited for this next stage. He is already following us around the room with his eyes, grabbing and clutching his toys,bringing those toys to her mouth, talking more and more, and starting to roll or attempt at it anyway. He's keeping his neck up wonderfully, giggle a few times here and there, and is sitting in his bumbo like a champ :). He has been sleeping through the night regularly around 9:30 to 7:00 and then goes back to sleep for at least another hour. That has given me sanity. :) I feel so much better as far as rest goes. Liam is starting to like being with mommy over others. It's exciting to be needed but at times it's hard. I still haven't gotten control over keeping the house cleaned. I can't imagine single moms our there or women with full time jobs. Thank you mom for working so hard and dealing with keeping up our home and me! I just can't imagine. I've just had to lose the inhibitions that I once had with the house. It will get done when it gets done. We ordered Liam a teething necklace that is supposed to release minerals into his skin to prevent drooling and pain from teething. Hopefully this works wonders for him. Posted is one of his pictures from his three month photo shoot. We are excited for these next few months of first.

Almost 3 months. . . .

2009-12-23T10:10:00.005-06:00

Liam will be 12 weeks on Monday. I can't believe almost 3 months have gone by. Part of the time is seems to be dragging and then other times the birth and first few weeks are already hard to remember. Liam has stolen my heart for good. He is smiling at everyone and everything now. When he sees Richard he smiles and he reacts to people in such a cute way. He's starting to also respond to "mommy" when he gets fussy. He seems to always calm down when I have him and I secretly LOVE this :)! He is starting to coo and talk to us too. He is using his hands more everyday and is starting to reach out and grab things. He sucks on his hands now because he has discovered the can conveniently fit :). He really is such a joy. He is still sleeping in our room. He hasn't quite gotten the all night sleep down yet. He sleeps for about 6 hours then wakes up to each and goes back to sleep for a few more. I'm thinking though after Christmas we will try him upstairs to see if he doesn't sleep better away from everyone. Mom is crossing her fingers that this works because a good night sleeps sounds heavenly. I do envy those moms who's children already sleep through the night, but then again I had a woman at church tell me that her daughter at 9 months still wakes up 3 times a night. So I'm counting my 6 hours a blessing!

Christmas is in two days. Although Liam won't remember it we will remember it for him. He's had his share of Santa outfits and red onsies. :) We are thanking the Lord for his 11 weeks of life and we are thinking of that baby who came to give us life as we enjoy Liam this Christmas.

Second Month

2009-11-26T16:40:00.002-06:00

Liam will be 8 weeks old on Monday. Not quite two months but almost there. He has changed so much in the past four weeks. He has filled out in the face and continues to do so daily. His cheeks are coming in and he is getting some dark roots from all the hair that fell out. He is now focusing on everything. He can follow your fingers and loves to stare and study. He is still struggling with gas but we are working on it. His digestive system is slow. He did this week at (7 weeks) look at me and smile. Although he won't do it for anyone else, he does it for Momma! :) He loves to lay on his belly and loves to kick and jump with his legs. He is amazing us with his strength he can turn his head, lift his head, and hold his whole body up. He has just this week started to go to bed with 5 oz of a pumped bottle around 10pm and sleeps until 3:00 or 3:30 then wakes back up around 6:30. Thank the Lord a routine is starting to fall into place. HE LOVES HIS BATH. He hates to get out afterward but he is now loving to sit in the warm water. I am enjoying him so much. It feels like I am playing house all the time. It's such a blessing to be a mommy. It is hard to balance getting things done between his feedings and nap times. He does like to be held. :) It is a great adventure each day. Now if only I could get used to getting out and about with him. . . :) I have to update his scrapbook and print some pictures out before I get behind! Hopefully I can keep up with the milestones!

First Month

2009-11-26T16:36:00.002-06:00

Liam's first month seems like a blur. During those first four weeks I dealt with ER visits and intense pyschological battles with excess bleeding. Thankfully our family was there for us. Liam was greatly cared for and so was I. Those every 2 and half our feedings seem so far off now. Man was it tiring. Basically he slept, ate, and pooped ;). Ah, the life of a newborn. I must add that he is though full of expression. His furrowed brow, smile, and random looks always kept us laughing :). His first four weeks was adjustment. That I won't forget.

He's HERE!!

2009-10-15T11:47:00.010-05:00

LIAM MORGAN VAN KLUYVE
October 5, 2009 11:11 a.m.
6.3 pounds and 20 inches long

Birth Story

Liam made his debut at 11:11 a.m. on Monday morning October 5, 2009. Although we knew that he would be born on Monday due to the induction, we never expected him to be born so quickly. He made his arrival in 4 hours!

Richard and I tried to go to bed around 9:00 Sunday night. It was nice to have our bags packed and everything in order. I was praying for weeks that we would be able to do that and thank God we were. It was stressful constantly looking over at a bag we packed for weeks wondering what else I could shove down in it at the last minute if my water broke, but thankfully the plan panned out.

We woke up around 4:00 a.m. and were both silent. It was like Christmas but with a twist. The fear of the unknown was a bit discerning but I wasn't at all scared. I had been dealing with stress for three weeks with pre-term labor and resting at home, so I was ready. The ride to the hospital was a bit surreal. We both didn't say much of anything. It was still dark and even the traffic lights weren't working. It was a surreal ride. We pulled into the ER, where we had to enter because even the hospital doors were locked until six, carried out our load of cameras, sleeping pallets, and pillows, got our admission papers and headed up to Labor and Delivery.

At 5:00 a.m. I was tagged and given room 204 which coincidentally was the same room I was put in at 35 weeks to stop my labor. The nurses were wonderful from the minute we stepped onto the floor. Kim was my nurse for the whole day, and oh how I had prayed for her. I asked the Lord for a nurse that was quiet in spirit and compassionate and boy did I get her. She was wonderful and calm and explained everything to me.

I was first handed the gown and told to change. Richard and I at that point were excited but anxious.

They hooked me to the fetal monitor, asked me a million general questions that were put into the computer, and the IV was put in. The purpose of the IV, especially if you are having an epidural or are induced is to get fluids into your body to keep you hydrated. I have to say the IV was no fun, but the cold drip felt great. Now that I look back I feel like the IV was worse than the epidural. After the IV was put in the pitocin was started. The drug that brings on contractions for induction. I was expecting immediate contractions and was nervous but was relieved to only feel subtle changes. Once my fluids were in and the pitocin was started we were nearing 7:00 a.m. Dr. McGuire was going to come in around 7:30 to break my water. As we waited Richard and I both watched the monitor with the Liam's heartbeat and my contractions. They were about every 7 minutes.

Around 7:30 a.m. the doctor came in, and boy was I so thankful to see Dr. McGuire. That was yet another plus about being induced. My doctor was right down the hall at her practice and could come in periodically and check in on me all throughout the day. She checked me immediately and to my surprise and hers I was already at 4cm and 100% effaced. She said the water sack was right at her finger tips. So immediately she broke my water. Again another experience that I was leery about, but it felt like nothing more than a regular pelvic exam. I'm thankful though because my water bag was close and some women have said getting their water broken was painful. I barley felt mine but immediately felt the warm gush that came out. Thankfully the nurse and Dr. McGuire knew exactly what they are doing and they let my water out slowly and changed towels immediately. I was worried I would gush all over the table, but was again surprised by the simple painlessness. As soon as my water broke Dr. McGuire put me on the epidural list.

The next thing I knew my contractions were immediately getting more and more intense. They were taking me by surprise and I remember Stephanie Wise coming in with a gift basket. I tried to conceal my pain and put a smile on my face but inside I was thinking if this is already so intense what is it going to really be like when I'm more dilated and where is that epidural guy. Richard never left my side and would tell me when the contractions were peaking and when I'd get a break. I remember Carrie telling me that at least you get breaks in between them but mine were coming so close I couldn't help but to wonder where my breaks were! The pain is hard to describe. The worst menstrual cramps you can imagine is not exactly what it feels like. It's a strange pain that no one can explain to you until you experience it yourself.

Finally the anesthesiologist showed himself. The whole epidural took about 30 minutes from the time they hook it up and get some questions answered. They run a test dose and then the real stuff is dripped in through the catheter. After about 15 minutes I was sat on the edge of the bed and told to stay really still. He gave me the first numbing shot and then placed the epidural catheter in. The first shot felt nothing more than a tiny bee sting and burned a bit, this was the numbing shot, and then after that I couldn't feel the epidural needle at all. The only sensation I felt was the catheter wire being pushed down into my back. I felt a weird sensation of something moving down my lower back. Once the tape was in place I laid down and PRAYED it would start working. My contractions were happening so rapidly that I was in another world. Kim checked me again and was surprised to see I was between 8 and 9 cm and she went ahead and called Dr. McGuire. She also told me we were going to start practice pushes and she set prepared the bed for labor. All the while my contractions intensified.

I was getting restless and was in a lot of pain. My legs were numb but my contractions weren't going away. I was so scared that I couldn't go through with labor without the epidural, but I was beginning to wonder if it was to late and if anything would help the pain. I remember gripping the side of the bed and blowing out air constantly. Trying to get in oxygen was not happening and the oxygen mask did not help. Nothing helped. The contractions were so close together that I couldn't describe the pain to anyone. It was the most intense thing I have ever felt or could ever imagine! I never yelled or said anything just tried to concentrate on blowing out air. It took all I had to remember to breathe and as much as I was trying to not think about it, the sudden urge to throw up keep creeping into my mind. I did later throw up a few times before the actual pushing, and that was yet another experience in itself. I'm not to good with meds and drugs.

Because the pain intensified. I began to wonder if the epidural was even in right but at this point I couldn't focus on anything other than the pain. I literally thought I'd rather die. At my breaking point I said "OH MY GOD THIS HURTS" and at that point Richard called the front desk and the nurse of anesthetist rushed in and gave me a huge dose of epidural by shooting it into my catheter drip. Apparently the epidural couldn't catch up to how quickly I had dilated but the extra dose immediately started to ease the pain. I went from a 10 in pain to maybe a 4 in the matter of 10 minutes. I was so thankful at that point but scared at the same time. My legs felt so heavy and lifeless, and I still had pushing ahead of me. I also had already thrown up a few times and I hadn't eaten since midnight the night before.

Once the epidural kicked in completely, we started practice pushes. It was so hard to tell if I was actually pushing because everything is completely numb. From the lower abdomen down everything is numb and heavy so you have to guess and assume your body remembers how to push without feeling that your actually doing it. Your mind has to take over. You have to decide that even though you feel nothing you have to assume you are pushing correctly. During these practice pushes everything was so calm. Kim the nurse Richard, mom, and I were the only ones in the room and that surprised me. I figured the pushing would bring in other nurses but it was nice to "practice" calmly.
I also continued to feel nauseated and tried to hold back the throw up.

Once I started crowing Dr. McGuire came in. She was surprised that I had progressed so fast, but I was thankful. We began the heavy pushing and in between I threw up another three times. I was so weak but after 45 minutes of pushing I remember Dr. McGuire telling me that she could get the vacuum to help me get Liam out but I decided that I had it in me to get this baby out on my own. I remember being in a fog. I kept my eyes closed through all of the pushing. Nurses did flood in when the actual baby was being born. I remember someone taking my left leg and Kim holding my right. Richard watched the whole delivery down with Dr. McGuire. I remember hearing "That's it" "Come on Babe" "He's right there" "Keep pushing". . . I looked around a few times and saw there were even more nurses in the room all with smiles on there faces. In between pushes I threw up and remember having to fight the urge through each push. It was quite the experience but again you are in another world. It's an out of body experience. You feel like your there but you feel like your not.

"Here he comes" was the last thing I really remember before the satisfaction of feeling his head come out. It was the greatest feeling of relief. I stopped pushing and then was told to push one more time and out he came screaming from the start. They put him right up on my belly and I remember saying "Hey baby"!! It was a surreal moment. Richard immediately cut the cord and kissed me with tear filled eyes. I love yous were exchanged and then they whisked Liam off to the warmer beside me. They cleaned him up and prepped him and he looked perfect.

While he was getting all the attention, I was getting cleaned up. I remember the doctor asking if I wanted to see my placenta and I kindly turned her down. I had an episiotomy and remember seeing her stitch me up and then remember being oh so thankful for the epidural. What I didn't expect was the intense pain that came while she pushed on my stomach. No one warned me about that. It was horrific. I actually remember moaning out load at that. She had to get all excess blood and any placenta out of my stomach. That was something I hadn't expecting nor want to remember.

After I was cleaned up, still in a fog mind you, they placed Liam on my chest all bundled up. They let him stay with me for an hour to nurse and bond and it was precious time for Richard and I. My mom left the room to go announce his arrival and we three bonded our new family! It was bitter sweet. After an hour they took him into the nursery and Richard went with him for his bath and tests. It was over, I had a baby! It is an empowering moment, but I was exhausted and had to remain chipper for the family that was coming in. It's a happy wonderful moment but it also surreal and exhausting.

Liam weighed 6 pounds and 3 ounces. I was surprised he was so small. He passed all his test with flying colors and the nurses were all commenting on how long he was 20 inches for his tiny weight. He was perfect and everyone thought so!

The next events were all trivial now that I look back. My epidural didn't wear off in my legs for 6 hours because of the high extra dose they shot me with at 9 cm. Because I couldn't feel my legs, I couldn't get up and move around or go to the bathroom. I did try to go the bathroom but fainted while sitting on the toliet. I was to weak but thankfully my wonderful husband was holding me up and carried me back to bed. Later I had to get a catheder to drain my urine and then attempted the bathroom trip again before bed. It was a success but again after labor and throwing up and being numb I was exhausted and weak beyond my expectation. I kept thinking of other friends who were up moving and showering two hours later. That wasn't my case at all.

We sent Liam to the nursery each night and tried to rest as much as possible. The nurses come in every three hours for pain meds and to check your vitals so sleep for mom isn't happening. Richard however loved his mattress we brought, which I recommend, and was out cold! :) He did however help me to the bathroom, changed my pads, and gave me meds. He is the greatest husband. Nothing phased him whatsoever. He was wonderful. All our friends came to visit followed by a few visitor on Tuesday and Wednesday morning. It's nice to feel loved but overwhelming at the same time when you don't feel up to par. I remember having a few breakdowns. Some of many to come. Hormones are raging.

We were sent home on Wednesday. Liam was circumsized, poked, prodded, and tested. He passed everything with flying colors. We were so thankful for a healthy baby, and on Wednesday afternoon we packed up and headed home. Thankfully my mom and Donna didn't leave our side. They came in cleaned up everything had dinner and didn't let me lift a finger. I highly recommended recruiting help! You are just physically exhausted!

My story didn't end there. Five days later after feeling good and starting to get my strength back, I had excessive bleeding. Bleeding that scared me beyond words. I was put on a medication that jump started contractions. Their purpose was to make me contract to push out any left over placenta or blood that was causing the bleeding. It was terribly painful and I had to be on intense pain killers to get through the pain. I passed the remaining clots and felt surly that it was over. Two weeks later it came back again and after a trip to the ER more blood tests run and worry beyond words, I finally am able to say I am feeling better and passed the icky stuff. My ultrasounds were clear of blood and Dr. McGuire felt confident that I was over the bad stuff. My blood tests were perfect and now I am just recovering day by day and getting used to life with a newborn. I'm so thankful the Lord was with me through everything and is still with me! There were some dark moments I have to admit, but Satan didn't get the best of me. I am also oh so thankful for my parents and Richard's parents who took care of me stayed the night and did everything for me. I couldn't have done it without them.

So that's my labor and delivery story from start to finish. I must say when I think back to how worried I was about labor I can laugh. Labor was so simple compared to the issues I had the weeks before and the weeks after. The labor was the easy part.

I can't lie, this is so difficult being a new mom. No sleep and trying to balance my life keeping up with the house and trying to feel remotely normal is hard. I have been told by everyone that the first 6 weeks is hell. So I'm trudging through it! I am so however in love with my Liam! :) He is beyond the greatest gift!

Counting Down

2009-10-01T13:09:00.008-05:00

Today marks the 3rd day of my 37th week. 18 more days till my due date, but thankfully only a few more till I'm induced. So many things are running through my mind. At my last checkup yesterday Dr. McGuire said I was a full 3 cm and 100% effaced. She also said his head was right within touch. Its amazing that I am already so far along and yet nothing has progressed me into active labor. I'm pretty miserable now. I haven't been out of the house much in two and a half weeks. I just get to nervous that my water will break or my contractions will pick up if I'm out and about. They seem to come on the more I move around and while most women welcome this, I have had to keep him in until full term which was Monday. So resting has been what I've had to do. It's been hard. This is hard on your body and spirit. Not to many people tell you that.

There's a constant since of urgency on your brian too. You want to make sure again and again that the bags are packed just right and that everything is in place. Your brain is constantly concerned with what your body is feeling and if it is time. Most women don't have to deal with the early labor I have had. I've dealt cramping and contractions for the last two and half weeks. They are uncomfortable and stressful. I've dealt with Tributalene medication that has made me feel terrible and now I'm justing bearing through contraction after contraction that doesn't seem to amount to anything. A lot of women don't feel this until they are in labor so they have a clear answer as to whether they should go in or not, but since I've had them for weeks I'm still not quite sure as to when I should go. I've been told to wait until my water breaks or my contractions are 5 minutes apart and terribly unbearable. I'm just concerned that since I've already dilated to 3 cm the actual labor will speed things up and happen to quickly.

I just want to say this has been the hardest part of pregnancy for me. The constant thoughts about the new baby and about how things will play out, the waiting game, the intense pressure on my body, and the constant fear of the unknown about birth. I still have a hard time believing that there is an actual human being inside of my body that I'm going to meet very soon. I can't wait to meet him but I'm ready for this process to be over. Negative Nancy I guess you could call me, but at this point and with this discomfort I am just ready to hold my baby and have my body back. 10 months is A LONG time to not feel like yourself. I've been blessed with a great pregnancy but these past few weeks have put a toll on my body and my emotions.

SO hopefully next time I write will be expressing how incredible it feels to be a mother. I have enjoyed snuggling with my husband and remembering all the times we've had thus far together, and we are getting excited about the new memories we will make as a family. It's been emotional to think about the change that's going to happen, considering it will never be the two of us again, but I think we are ready to pour our 10 years worth of loving each other into someone else. He is so wonderful and is so excited to meet his boy or his "buddy" as he was say. We are leaning on and trusting our Lord and trying to wait patiently!!

Info to remember ***
(I've gained about 25.5 pounds to date. I think that's where I'll stay, and we are thinking Liam will be between 6.12 and 7.3 lbs) :).

Liam's Latest Update

2009-09-15T16:06:00.002-05:00

Today's 35 week appointment went well. I am now at 2 cm and still 80% effaced. So I have progressed half a cm over the past few days but nothing else. The doctor also suggested that I get off of the pill I've been on because of how lousy it has been making me feel. She says the pill won't stop labor it will just ease the discomfort, but I am not in active labor at this point. She seems to think that I may feel better without the pill and so I'm going to try and stay off it and see what happens. The contractions and cramping may come back but she has had women deal with those kind of things months before labor. She said that if I was earlier than 35 weeks she would be concerned but that she isn't concerned at this point and to take the pill if I didn't want to deal with the nagging idea of "should we go in" or "should we wait it out."

The ultrasound was perfect and Liam looks perfect in every way. I couldn't make out much in the pictures but he was keeping his hands in front of his face and wouldn't cooperate. Right now he weighs 5.8 lbs and she said that even if I carried him full term he would only be around 7 to 7.5 lbs. She also said that if I still felt this way at 38 weeks she would induce and he would be around 6.5 or a high 6 lbs baby. I was thrilled with that. Small baby :). . .

So now we wait. I'm not technically on bed rest. She just suggested that I take it easy and call if I can't handle the discomfort. Its hard to play a waiting game and not have any control over what your body is wanting to do. We are just praying he stays in a few more weeks and that I can handle the discomfort that comes along with it.

On a funny note she did say that there was a lot of amniotic fluid around him which was wonderful but that when my water broke it would be a huge gush not just a small leakage. So here I am a ticking time bomb just waiting to feel something or feel nothing. Being pregnant is a strange and wonderful thing all at the same time. So here's to waiting. . . .

The Latest

2009-09-14T22:00:00.002-05:00

I thought I would share quickly what has happened over the past few days. I started having some minor cramping Wednesday night that continued all day Thursday and into Friday. I had both showers this past weekend and was a little nervous about the cramping I was experiencing. So after I called the doctor she suggested I go into Labor and Delivery and get checked out for peace of mind. I debated it ALL day and finally decided around 5:00 that we should go in. Once we got there and got settled, I was hooked to a fetal monitor and found out I was contracting every 3 to 5 minutes. I then got checked and was almost 2 cm and 80% effaced. To my shock they told me that I needed to get the labor stopped seeing that I was not even 35 weeks yet. After a series of three shots of, a drug that stops labor, I was sent home but not before a long visit with the trash can on the way out. Needless to say it was no fun. I was terribly upset seeing that I had two showers upcoming.

Saturday morning I woke up with the same cramping and called the doctor. They prescribed me the pill form of the shots I had been given. The shots/pill both cause shaking, dizziness, and heart racing. I was not feeling to great but managed to make it to my shower with my high school friends hosted by Jessica Van Trease. It was an amazing shower and I am so blessed to have them. Then yesterday I had my TDF shower and was beyond overwhelmed with everything I got. I even had to leave the shower for a bit because I was feeling so bad, but I managed to make it through. Thanks to Jenny and Jess everything got put away washed and organized all while I watched from the couch. I've been told to rest only.

So today I've had a few contractions here and there but I go in tomorrow for my ultrasound and to get checked again. We will see how big Liam is and go from there. Hopefully he will be big enough that my labor won't have to be controlled by the pill. I"m just really praying the Lord watches over both of us and that everything will work out.

There's the quick update. Not to formal just needed to get it down so that I can remember this. I'll update after the appointment tomorrow.

34 Weeks

2009-09-07T14:24:00.002-05:00

I am officially only 6 weeks off from my due date. Last doctor appointment went well. Gained 2 more pounds putting me at 25 pounds now. I'm still thinking I'll top out at around 30 pounds. We took the tour of Summit and got to see the baby floor and where we would be staying. It made everything seem a lot more real. As far as symptoms go at this stage. I'm getting tired. I really don't want to stand for long periods of time and it's really difficult to breathe. Liam still moves constantly and has the hiccups sometimes four times a day. She said he will most likely have them that many times out of the womb too. FUN :)! It's hard at night now. I'm waking up almost every two hours from discomfort. It seems like every way I try to lay I get sore, have to use the bathroom, or can't breathe. I'm continuing to have my Braxton Hicks and I go in next week for our last ultrasound. My two baby showers are this week too on Saturday and Sunday :). I'm excited and thankful for those who love me enough to help. Once I have those things cleaned and put away, I will feel so much better about things. Things are moving along. I can't believe I'll be having a baby next month! :) I can't wait to see you Liam!

Richard continues to be very sweet and supportive. Everyone is overly protective and Richard still talks constantly to Liam calling him his buddy. :) I'm starting to get the "wow your really showing now" "that belly is sticking out" "I think it's grown in a few days". Oh the things people say. I have learned what not to say to someone who is pregnant!

8th Month Mark!

2009-08-24T10:34:00.004-05:00

Today marks my 32 week and the beginning of my 8th month. I only have 5 more weeks until I reach the full term mark. Then Mr. Liam could come at anytime and be healthy! 5 weeks seems so close to be FULL TERM! I'm ready for it though. I can honestly feel my body getting more and more uncomfortable. I can definitely tell that this extra 23 lbs is taking it's toll one me. Symptoms are still the same just more intensified. I get tired just moving around which is not fun for me because I always like to do projects and clean. The breathing is getting harder and sleeping you can forget a full nights sleep. I woke up at least 5 times last night. The indigestion and heart burn is rough and I'm starting to wonder if this will ever end :). I know it's only going to get worse too. Hopefully if I gain a lb a week I'll be right at 30 lbs. That is if he takes 8 full more weeks. I really want to meet him. He is still actively rolling and moving from one side to the other. The kicks are slowly starting to dissipate but he definitely likes to roll and move. His hiccups happen about twice a day still and I can really tell he likes music and our pastor Rob's voice. He constantly moves when he hears either.

Next week we go in for a normal OB appointment, and we are also taking the tour of the labor unit. Then our next appointment will be his final ultrasound. This is the appointment I'm anxious for. We will see how big he is, what she thinks will be the best route for delivery will be, and if I've dilated any. Richard and are just anxious to see him one last time on the ultrasound :). He'll be so big.

I finished up the nursery as much as I had hoped. My showers are in a few weeks and I'm going to wait and see what I get there before I try and finish up a few last things in his room. But I feel prepared in that sense.

That's my update. Everything seems to be going as planned. I have truly been blessed in my pregnancy. Everything has gone smoothly and hopefully it will continue to do so. I'm just praying these last 7 or so weeks will go by quickly. My body might not be able to stand much more :)! I want to meet him too!

10 Weeks and Counting

2009-08-10T12:56:00.002-05:00

Today marks my 30th week! I can definitely tell my body is changing. I'm reacting to the heat with swollen ankles and feet. I'm starting to feel nauseated after I eat things. I am having a much harder time sleeping and taking deep breaths, and I am getting A LOT bigger. I think the uncomfortable stage has successfully set it and I will still have 10 weeks OR LESS left or at least that is what I keep telling myself.

I know it doesn't sound fun but I'm trying to remember everything so I can look back on this the second time around and remember even the negatives. I went to the doctor on August 5th and everything looked great. My glucose test came back negative and I had gained right at about 20 pounds. I still can't believe I have room to gain anymore but hopefully I can stick right to 30 pounds by the time he gets here. I think a lot of it is fluid seeing that it's so terribly hot. I start going to the doctor every two weeks now. After mid September it will be every week. I'm getting anxious but can only imagine how ready I'll be to have this child out of me!! I'm ready to meet Mr. Liam.

The nursery furniture is in and set up. The hutch comes in today to the top of the dresser and then I can decorate. After my showers I'll hope to feel better about being prepared. We've registered at Target and are thankful for friends and family who giving our showers upcoming in September. I guess this all is really going to happen.

Liam is still supper active. He rolls and pushes and stretches now more than anything. He still pushes his butt and back up toward my belly button all the time, causing me to breath, and he gets the hiccups about three times a day. I so often wonder what he looks likes. It's still so hard to believe there is a human child inside me. What a God we have!

Well that's the latest update. I get his last ultrasound in 5 weeks and will know then just how big this baby is going to be :)!

Moving Right Along

2009-07-19T15:23:00.006-05:00

It's been a month since I've updated and things are definitely changing. My last doctor's appointment went well. I had my 6 month glucose test and had to drink a sugary liquid to test for diabetes. That was no fun. After waiting an hour, I had my blood drawn, weighed in (16.5 pounds total), and met with Dr. McGuire. Liam's heart rate was at 153 and he measured perfectly. She answered a few of my questions about epidurals and concerns and said after this next appointment in August we would be in there every two weeks. I'm already at my two week appointments with only 13 weeks left to go. I know these last few months will go by so quickly. I'm ready to meet him. I can't get Karen's statement out of my head "It's like meeting someone new that you've already known."

In the past few weeks I've been feeling fairly normal. I haven't been extremely tired or fatigued. It is getting harder to breathe when Liam pushes himself toward my belly button, my back has started to ache after sitting for long periods of time, and it is getting challenging to find the perfect position to sleep in. I have had a few days of feeling miserable as far as stretching and aching goes and have learned that on some days you just feel off.

His movements have now turned to rolls and full blown rotating. He isn't just kicking anymore he is definitely growing out of room. I still can't make out exact body parts but I can definitely feel where he is and can't mistake a foot, elbow, or knee traveling from one side of my belly to the other. I can feel him kicking on my right side and all the way to the left. He is 2 lbs and 14.5 inches long. That's one skinny long baby. My belly is unmistakably pregnant now. People have started giving me the sympathy sweet smile when they notice I'm pregnant and I'm sure I'll be getting the questions soon enough. I can't believe I'm going to be entering my 3rd trimester in a week. The idea of growing a human life inside of me still blows my mind. I can't believe half of me and half of Richard have creating this miracle. I'm getting the itch to hold him now. I can't wait to just stare at him. I had my first nursing dream on the 11th. I don't remember his exact looks but I remember how elated I was. Soon enough he'll be here.

The room is officially painted and furniture is getting delivered tomorrow. My hutch is on backorder but the rest of the furniture will be put up as soon as we get home from vacation. I've picked out my fabrics for the baby bedding. Maria Murdock and Debbie Mynster are so graciously are gifting me with beautiful hand made items for his crib. My shower is on September 13th, and RIchard and I are looking forward to registering when we get home. Things are moving along quite quickly.

Emotionally I'm trying to cherish every second that I have now. I know it will never be the same, people have made that clear, so I am trying to cherish the now. Richard and I are ready to share the love we've found in each other and developed for the past 10 years with someone else. I think it will only draw us closer. I still just can't believe I'm at this stage in my life. It's where I have always wanted to be.

P.S.-This picture is at the last day of my 26th week. I wouldn't normally post my bare belly but since this blog is for my own record I decided only a choice few would see it.

June 17th Check Up

2009-06-22T10:11:00.003-05:00

I went to the doctor last Wednesday. It was just a routine 15 minute check up. I weighed in and have gained about 12 pounds to date. Supposedly your suppose to gain in between 10 and 15 pounds so I'm right where I need to be. It still is no fun getting on that scale when you know the numbers can jump so drastically from the month before when you came in, but she did say the baby would double from last visit to this visit so that accounts for the extra 5 and a half pounds. We discussed c-sections and birthing classes and also got to hear the heartbeat. She said that as of now I look good for a vaginal birth but we would reconsider towards the end when we saw just how big Liam is going to be. She also said she didn't feel the birthing classes were necessary so I'm not sure that Richard and I will attempt those. We will see. My next visit is in three weeks. I'll have to drink the sugar drink and get my blood drawn for the glucose test. I'm not looking forward to it, but again it's part of it. His heart beat was at 159, she said he was excited. I think he always is. I can almost constantly feel him moving now even standing up, that is until someone wants to feel him kick and then of course his stops. It is such a surreal feeling to have a living being constantly moving in your body. It's just to hard to explain to someone who hasn't felt it.

This week we got the room painted with taupe and cream stripes. It's so cute. We went furniture shopping and I found exactly what I want from JCPenny but when we went to order it the shipping cost an extra 250 dollars so we decided to put it off for a bit. I don't know what I really want now but we will figure something out. I'm just glad the guest room and his room are semi-complete and painted now. I have 17 weeks left if I go full term which is really just 4 months. Ready to see what this baby looks like. I really would love to have a maternity photo session around 30 weeks or so. I have to capture this big belly, even though it's not my favorite :). There's just a lot to think about.......

Update

2009-06-10T21:27:00.002-05:00

Well it's been about three weeks since I last updated. I think I have definitely grown since then and have been feeling a variation of different yet new symptoms. The doctor told me that between my 18 week visit and my visit coming up next week at 22 weeks the baby would double in size and I would blossom out too. She was certainly right. I have a definite pooch now and can feel my sides stretching and aching almost daily. At 18 weeks I had gained 7 lbs and I think I have probably added on about 4 or 5 more. We will find out next Wednesday. Typically you are supposed to gain anywhere between 10 and 15 pounds at this point. Oh the joys of weight gain. I haven't been eating a lot, am walking everyday, and trying not to eat to much if any junk food. I think every body is just different in how and where they gain weight. It seems to be all belly/chest now :) But it has been hard to see myself gaining weight. I have always been a petite person but I think its hard for any woman to see the scale increase daily! That has been hard.

The aching, stretching stomach has been uncomfortable too. It feels like I just have aching sides all the time. It almost as if someone is pulling down on my stomach. No stretch marks, yet though. I'm trying to be really conscious of that. My doctor said they are genetic and my mom never got any herself so I'm keeping my fingers crossed!

Let's see, another symptom....how about sleeplessness and restlessness at night. I wasn't sleeping to bad until the past few weeks. Getting up to use the bathroom on top of feeling uncomfortable in almost all positions is already getting me at 5 months! I can't even imagine what it will be like at 8 months. Oh joy. I'm going to have to invest in a body pillow to prop my stomach up on while I sleep :). I miss sleeping or just being able to lay on my belly!

Other than those things I'm not feeling sick or to tired. I feel pretty normal other than the few aches, pains, and frequent potty breaks! :)

Liam is so active now. I feel him every time I sit down. The kicks are getting a lot stronger and a lot more spread out across my belly. I can actually see my belly moving now! He is about 7 inches or more. Comparable to a large banana in length. I can't believe he's already that big. It's still hard for me to imagine that there is a human life growing inside of me. I don't think it will seem completely real until I hold him.

I'm hoping to start the nursery soon. I've been working on the guest room and will move into that next. Well that's my update for now. I'll update again after the next appointment. :)

It's A BOY!!

2009-05-26T12:55:00.004-05:00

I have to say that last Wednesday was an emotional one. I will go ahead and admit that I was bit sad to hear it was boy at first. I had secretly hoped it was a girl the entire time and Richard's hope for a girl added that much more to the disappointment I felt when I first heard the news. It was an emotional ride home to say the least. I was feeling guilty for being upset about a boy, feeling nervous about the idea of raising a boy, and a little shocked to be honest. I guess I had always seen myself as having girls. The appointment/ultrasound went wonderful. I have gained 7.5 pounds so far and Dr. McGuire said I couldn't have a more perfect baby. Every thing measured well and he is developing perfectly. She said he was actually measuring a week ahead because of how LONG he is. Since his daddy is 6'4, I sort of expected that! She also commented on his second toe being longer than his first, just like Rich's ;). Below is a link to the ultrasound....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9N1-2XREoI

Needless to say the shock has since wore off and the idea of a baby boy has begun to set in. My parents were ecstatic seeing that my dad has never had any boys around, and he was even more thrilled to find out his middle name was Morgan after him and his father. He even cried a little for me :). Everyone else's reactions were wonderful. My sister screamed at the top of her lungs and my friends were really supportive and sweet. I'm excited to raise a boy with Carrie. Hopefully Mayer and Liam will be great friends!

If I could chose the gender of my children it would be a baby boy first. I will get my Liliana Rose one day :) She'll be a wonderful joy but this baby boy will be the perfect first addition.Everyone has told me that raising boys are easy and less expensive and that its good to have that older protective brother first. I have to insert a note my wonderful friend Corrie wrote me about having a boy. After reading her letter I was so relieved and have since gotten secretly excited about the idea of having a sweet baby boy who loves his momma. Below is her letter.....

With a boy, you will have this connection-- can't really be explained-- that is so tender and precious. He will light up your heart. With a girl, there are times when you would feel in competition with her for Richard's affection (at least I used to) and sometimes you would miss being the only girl in his heart. But having a boy, you are giving him an HEIR...Many couples try over and over again to have that first boy, and you are having one the very first try!! This boy will be a Van Kluyve for the rest of his life, and will be Richard's legacy. Boy's are also easier than girls-- emotionally, and with clothes, etc...and although you are looking forward to doing all the girly stuff with a daughter one day, boys are an easier way to learn how to be a mommy..honestly. Then when you have a daughter, you will have a lot of the difficult new experiences already under your belt. Not only that, but I have two older brothers...and let me tell you...I wouldn't trade that relationship for ANYTHING. Stan, especially, has been a rock in my life and I cannot imagine not having a protective older brother!! Now, when you have a little girl, she will have an older brother to protect her and drive her places before she gets her license and fight off her suitors and...and...and... The list is endless. Not only that, but one day your son will be an adult himself, and when he looks at you with such love and devotion, you will be reminded what a miracle from God he is. There is a friction you will feel with a girl, emotionally, that though you wouldn't trade her for anything, can be very frustrating. You won't have that friction with a son.

She always makes me feel so much better. So the planning begins. After telling everyone about the news and letting the news sink in, I am ready to start getting ready for this little guy. I can't wait to see his room finished and imagine him being in it. I'm going to try and enjoy these last few months with my hubby though because I know it will never be the same. I am looking forward to the change though. I think having a family will draw us that much more together. We are already talking to him and singing to him. He will have to get used to the idea that his parents are crazy, crazy in love and crazy about him :).

So here's to our baby boy, that will be spoiled rotten, dressed to the max (thanks to dad), and deeply loved. :)

I love you Liam Morgan already more than you know!

Dear Baby

2009-05-19T11:12:00.002-05:00

I'm in my 18th week and tomorrow at 9:45 we are finding out what this little booger is. For four and a half months I've carried this little bean with me, and tomorrow I will finally feel truly connected. I'm anxious and excited. Either way, boy or girl, I know this baby will be more loved and more spoiled than it can ever imagine!

This baby is the first grandchild on both sides of the family. Richard's side has all boys and my said has many girls, so either way everyone is ready to know. I'm excited to start getting ready for this little one. Nursery, clothes, the whole works! I think after tomorrow this whole pregnancy will feel that much more real!

I've been feeling good. I can tell my stomach is stretching and moving by the pressure and achiness but other than that, I don't feel pregnant much anymore, that is until I feel the squirming going on inside. The movements are still sporadic but more consistent. It's hard to describe to someone what it exactly feels like. Just like tiny pops and jolts of popcorn in your lower tummy. Tomorrow we will get the whole anatomy screening. We will see its face, lips, hands, legs, etc...finally it will look like a ready baby instead of a tiny bean. :)!! I wrote a short letter to this little one and am posting it below. I'm more or less doing this so that I can print these blogs and put it in his or her baby book as a record of how he/she was carried into this world. Wahooo for tomorrow!

Dear Little One,

For as long as I remember, you have been on my heart and in my thoughts. Growing up all I every wanted with my life was to love a child. Only the Lord could have foreseen what my life would look like, and even then as I played with dolls HE knew I'd be sitting here now with you inside me. He's knitting you together perfectly for his will, and I am already completely astounded at the miracle that you are. You've already taught me patience and perseverance, and I am utterly looking forward to meeting you. Whether or not you are a boy a girl, you will be loved for the gifts and talents the Lord is instilling in you as we speak. You will be shown His love, taught how to be honest, patient, and most importantly loving. There are so many wonderful things I want to teach you and show you, and I am grateful to have been given this chance to carry such a miracle into this world. Your Dad and I promise to love you unconditionally for our entire lives and for our everlasting lives with Him.
I love you, Mom :)

16th Week

2009-05-10T20:44:00.003-05:00

Here's a pictures of what a baby looks like at 16 weeks.

I'm coming to the close of my 16th week. I am heading strong into my 4th month. It really does seem to go by fast. Well at least at times. I am ready for it to though. This week I've experienced a lot of firsts. On Monday, I started feeling movement for the first time. I might have been feeling it a few weeks ago, but I officially recognized it as being the baby this week. It feels like tiny popcorn inside your belly. I just love to imagine what it's doing inside there. :) Everytime I sneeze, it moves a little :). Wednesday night (5/6) was the first time that Richard felt it with his hand. He was to cute about it. He was grinning from ear to ear, and I was laughing at him because he kept saying "shhhh" "shhhh"! I asked told him it didn't matter if I was talking or not and he said it helped him "concentrate" more if I was quiet. So every night since then we get in bed together and his hand travels right to my belly. To me the baby is most active mid day and right when I get in bed. That may be because I am sitting long enough to notice it moving but it is a fun treat at night for the both of us. Physically I've been feeling pretty normal. I've just started getting those side muscle ache's from the streching today. It feels like I just worked my abs out for hours. I guess it comes with the streching, but it's not a lot of fun. It's hard seeing your body change so much. Get ready girls it will all be different! Other than feeling tired at times, I'm doing good. Only 10 more days until we know what this little one is! I am ready for that! Ready to see this baby again on ultrasound too. It's comforting though feeling it move now. I'm still finding myself a little leary of all the attention. I'm not one who likes attention in the first place and it seems that's all I'm getting. I know it will only get worse too. I'll take it in stride! We are going to try and narrow down our names this week so that we can have our name to anounce when we find out what we are having. :) I got a few baby gifts this week too:) A bottle warmer unit, some stuffed animals, and a swaddler. I can't imagine what the first grandchild will rake in :). Poor spoiled thing. Well today was my first Mother's Day. It was exciting to hear. Sometimes I'm so ready to meet this little life and at other times I'm trying to soak in all my quiet moments with Rich :). Oh the wave of emotion it all brings. It truley takes over all parts of you but as everyone says "It will all be worth it."

On to week 17! I can't believe there are 40!

15 Week Appointment

2009-04-30T09:50:00.003-05:00

Yesterday was my 15 week check up. Same ole' same ole' though. I got weighed, got a few questions answered, and heard that heartbeat on doppler. That is always comforting. At first she couldn't find the heartbeat and said the baby was just moving to fast for her to catch it. Then she realized that she needed her other wand that that measured shorter depths. She said because I was petite I didn't need the deeper depth wand. So she went and got the shorter one and immediately there was the heartbeat. Fast again first starting at 159 then jumping up to 163. I asked her if she thought girls had higher heart rates and she said that in the last trimester girls almost always have higher heartbeats. She said that is why delivery nurses can guess what your having by the heart monitors. She said it's hard to tell when babies are this small and that most babies at this stage measure anywhere from 150 to 160. So we will see. I also have still only gained 3.5 pounds. I was sure I had gained more but nothing yet. She said that she's seen some mothers not gain anything until after 6 months. So I figure that 3.5 at 4 months is pretty decent. I can definitely feel my uterus moving up. It's to the point now that Richard can feel it too. It starts real low and is slowly making its way toward my belly button. I think have have felt a few different movements but she said that most mothers don't fully recognize a baby kick until around 18 weeks. She said I may be feeling something but because I haven't had a baby before I could easily mistake it for gas or simple rumbling. Since all your organs are being shifted around it's easy to feel anything weird at this point. So we find out in three weeks what this little one is. Hopefully I will really narrow down some names in that time frame. I'm hoping to get a baby name book I can mark up soon. Once we find out what this little one is the room and everything will start taking shape. Then the excitement builds even more. I'm trying to post a video of my baby's heartbeat from yesterday but it won't up load, I might try later.

14 Weeks

2009-04-21T11:21:00.003-05:00

Well nothing much exciting has happened in the past two weeks with the pregnancy. My belly is growing though. I've felt reasonably good. I guess it's true, after 12 weeks you start to feel a bit normal again. I have to admit though that 9 months is truly a long time for your body to feel so abnormal. Everything is focused on and geared toward making this life inside of me. It is still so crazy to think about. I've decided that the first 12 to 14 weeks of pregnancy are just not fun. You just feel tired and not normal. Nothing about you seems to be the way it was. I often asked myself if I'd ever feel normal again :). Its just that in the first few weeks you don't feel pregnant, you feel bloated, and you just feel weird. You can't feel the baby or know what it is you just are in waiting mode. I hate to complain because I have it it reasonably well with little sickness. I'm just tired of feeling like I'm living in a foreign body. I know I have 6 more months of this too. Once we find out what it is in four weeks and I can feel this little baby moving, I think I'll feel wonderfully different. I'm just venting a bit :). I'm preparing all you unpregnant women for what may come. You may love being pregnant though. A few symptoms I've had lately are weird aching pains in all over my stomach. Stretching, moving, pulling aches that are just plain unnatural. I guess my belly is just shifting and rotating and making more room. I've also had a heightened sense of smell. I can smell EVERYTHING even when Richard doesn't. It's strange. I also have the weirdest aftertaste after everything I eat. I just want to brush my teeth all the time. Strange happenings I know.

I'm posting the last picture of my belly. It's ever growing. :) That's about it for now. Off to play bunco tonight! :)

12 Weeks Today!!!

2009-04-06T20:21:00.002-05:00

Today marks my 12th week and my 12th week check up. I was expecting to get weighed this week and hear the heartbeat by a doppler device, but I was gladly mistaken when they told me I would have an ultrasound. My wonderful doctor told me that she prefers giving a 12 week ultrasound over using a doppler because sometimes its hard to find a heartbeat at 12 weeks and she hates to scare mothers when she cant find it. So she gives her mothers the reassurrance they need and that she gave me. The baby was moving and active as ever. Our "little one's" arms were moving and head was moving. The heartbeat was 162 and it measured 5.34 cm. I have heard that girls heartbeats are higher, but I have friends who's boys heartrates were just as high. So we will see. I have gained 3 and a half pounds in the 12 weeks, and I am feeling good. The nausea really hasn't bugged me in a week or so as long as I eat. Things are good. Richard wasn't at this ultrasound. He is at the Master's and I miss him terribly. He was so upset that he missed this becaue like I said we weren't expecting the ultrasound but luckily we chated earlier and I got to show him everything. He is so very excited. It makes me love him that much more. Well that's 12 weeks. I'm ready to feel this baby! Only 6 more till we know what it is! I'm thanking the Lord for the blessings He has already given us, and looking foward to the future.

Money Pit is starting :)

2009-04-01T21:29:00.004-05:00

Well I've paid all of two bills so far just for lab work and already paid $300 bucks :). The actual bills were close to 1000, but with insurance I had to pay 20%. That's only after the first set of lab work! :) Just wanted to inform everyone to save up for babies because when the bills come in they come in. I am going Monday to settle all the bills overall. Should be interesting. No one tells you all this stuff. I'm figuring on about three grand out of pocket with a normal delivery. We will see.

Today was beautiful outside. I just didn't really feel like enjoying it. It's amazing how truly unlike yourself you feel. Honestly just an overall BLAH feeling would suffice. No energy and no motivation have all been apart of this 11 and a half weeks and that is so unlike me. I'm ready for some change!

Richard is leaving Friday for a week :(. I don't know if I can stand it. I never like it when he leaves but being pregnant makes it so much worse. Hopefully it goes by faster than fast.

Week 11. . . .

2009-03-30T16:11:00.004-05:00

Well I made it on my first trip. We just got back from Detroit, Michigan yesterday. I made the eight hour drive feeling fine. I was a little concerned about it seeing that I get car sick on top of being pregnant but it was ok. Those Reglan pills my doctor gave me sure came in handy. It's finally week 11. It seems like it is just dragging by. I want to be done with this first trimester so badly that I think I'm making the time seem slower. I still have the same symptoms. I need to eat alot. I'm not showing in the mornings. I can tell, but no one else can. After I eat you sure can tell though. I get supper bloated after I eat anything but unfortunately it goes away. I know there's something going on though. TMI-I know, but my boobs are bigger and my pants are a little snugger. Guess that's how it goes. I'm also beginning to wonder when other people started to show with their first baby. Guess I will have to ask around more! :) I'm ready ready ready to feel this baby. My next appointment is next Monday. Just a check up to weigh me and listen to the heartbeat. I can't wait to hear that heartbeat again! It is very comforting! I haven't been reading to much. Just keeping up with my "what to expect" book as far as weeks go. I'm trying to eat as healthy as I can although the doctor said the first 12 weeks are survival weeks and to eat whatever I felt like I could handle. So I snack alot. No caffeine though. None! Well maybe a sip that's it. I've had the weirdest belching since I got pregnant. I know it's gross but that is one of my major symptoms. I'll sure take that over getting sick though. I've got my nursery ideas in my mind, but I think I'm just going to wait on buying things until I know what this baby is. Only 7 more weeks!!

Beside baby news, things are good at home. Same ole, same ole! Rich is leaving for the Master's golf tournament Saturday. Not looking forward to being husbandless for 5 days. When you get pregnant you seem to need them to just be there so much more! I think it will be rough on me! We are looking for a new car. We've only had one for over 6 months. It's been fine because I work from home and Rich is usually home on and off all day, but we are gonna need something before October. Some kind of SUV, hopefully the Cadillac we want :). Family is good. Life is a blessing. :) That's my update for now.

10 Weeks and Counting

2009-03-24T08:45:00.003-05:00

Yesterday was my 10 week mark. It was one of the best days I have had so far that is until dinner. I had so much energy yesterday and completely forgot that I was pregnant but when I came down from finishing up my work I started to get a little nauseous. No biggie right, just eat it will go away. This time it didn't and I immediately took one of my Reglan pills that my obgyn gave me for nausea. Those have been life savers. When you are pregnant get them for backup. I've only had to use 3 so far, but it really does take away any sickness I promise. I was already so nauseous by the time I started making dinner that the smell of the food hit me like a ton of bricks. I just knew it would be my first date with the toilet. I was determined to not let it be but then again anything would have felt better. I laid down with a cold rag and after about 30 to 45 minutes it went away. I think the pill kicked in and I was up and around eating too like nothing had happened. My first spell of vomiting was avoided! My doctor said that if I could make it through 10 weeks she thought I would be sick free. Last night when I started to get sick I was so frustrated but thank God it went away. We are leaving tomorrow for an 8 hour car trip to Michigan with some friends. I sure hope my normal car sickness doesn't mix with the pregnancy! You better believe my pills will be at my side. I weighed this morning. I've gained about 2 lbs which is ok I guess. Your supposed to gain between 2 and 4 lbs during your first 12 weeks. I just hope I don't blimp out in the next few. I need to get walking again. I tried walking a few weeks ago and it made me really sick feeling. My doctor told me to wait until after 12 weeks. She said to then try exercising again. I guess exercising can be to much for some moms during the first few weeks. Well that's been my rollacoaster ride for the past few days. It seems like there are always good and bad days. I am just ready to feel this baby and have reassurance that there is a life inside of me that my body is fighting to create just perfectly. A LIFE inside of me! No wonder you get so out of wack!

Now on to another day. We will see how it goes. Maybe if I'm brave I'll post some belly pics soon.

Word travels fast....

2009-03-19T10:35:00.011-05:00

It seems like the word is officially out now. We have pretty much announced to everyone that we are expecting. I think that as far as the majority goes, we have covered all the bases. If not, word will keep spreading I'm sure. Facebook really helped in that matter! Henry and Virginia want to be called Nonie and Popie. :) They just informed us of that. My mom and dad want to be called Mimi and Pop, and Donna wants to be called Nonna. I haven't heard from Rick yet, but our child will be so confused with all these names. That doesn't even include Donna's parents. Poor child. Everything seems to be going fairly well. I still have to eat every few hours and will be more than happy when these 12 weeks are over. I think my mom is even more protective now than she ever has been. She calls me everyday but now its a lot more. I'm sure it will die down once the shock has surpassed but it is still a bit overwhelming. It might die down for maybe 9 weeks until we find out what it is. Then comes the spoiling. Anyway I just wanted to write a quick update. I'm trying to keep some form of record of this pregnancy for my own memories and for my friends who may want some advice when they are going through it.

Carrie brought Mayer home yesterday. I hope she is feeling good! He is just a beautiful gift! I can't wait to see mine!! I'm attaching some pictures that we have taken up until now :).

Baby Journal... may be TMI beware! :)

2009-03-18T13:58:00.003-05:00

January 22nd, Tried Conception Today!

January 23rd, Still Trying to Conceive!

February 12th, I cannot believe this is my
body!

I've missed my period for four days now. I'm assuming I am pregnant. The first two test that I took were negative, but I bought the cheap ones and don't think I took them right. I'm going to take another one tomorrow morning. I've had nausea but no vomiting. I've had horrible lower abdomen cramping, like I would have had on my period, tender breasts, and an overall weird feeling. I can't believe when you find out your pregnant you are already four weeks. Richard and I are anxious to find out just exactly if I am pregnant, we will see!!

February 13th, The Most Amazing thing Happened!

The first few tests I took were negative. I think again it was because of the less sensitive brand I took and because I took them on the day of my missed period. Well today is Friday and I took the final one of the pack. Immediately the pregnancy showed up! So there is no denying it! I am PREGNANT! Richard is working out! I'm going to have the video camera ready when he gets home! :) I did wake up with some brown discharge. I hope this is normal. Right now, I feel nauseous but that's OK! Last night I was secretly elated to myself. I know my body and new I was pregnant! I don't think it will sink in until I hear that heartbeat!!! Lord bless this child as you knit him or her together in my womb.

February 16th, First Appointment!

I'm going to my first doctor's appointment today! I'm just meeting with the nurses and getting blood work, an exam, and all the pre-visit over with. I'll find out the due date and how far I am :). I feel great, as long as I keep eating!

Well, I went to the doctor. I am official PREGNANT! My urine sample was positive. She said it was faint at first but then popped right up as positive. We went over questions and concerns. She drew my blood (a lot of it) and then set me up for my next appointment to see the first ultrasound at 8 weeks and hear the heartbeat on March 9th. So in three weeks, we can see our "Little one." Rich and I have named it that so we can have something to call he or she for the next 16 weeks. I have to say when I left here I was all SMILES. I am just full of joy! We have decided to wait until after our March 9th appointment to tell anyone. We want to make sure the baby looks healthy. My nausea has gone away. As long as I eat every few hours all day long, I am good to go. She prescribed me two prescriptions for nausea incase it gets worse. I am praying that I continue to feel good so that I can enjoy this special miracle growing inside me. What a blessing.

February 18th, Blood Work

Today my doctor called and left a message on my phone. I was very nervous when I saw the call. The nurse had told me they would call if there were any problems with my blood work. Of coarse I assumed something was wrong when I saw that I missed the call. Well I wrong. The nurse just told me that all my blood work came back normal every test they ran was perfect. She also said that my thyroid was normal, which was a relief and it means the medicine is working. She told me I was (O+) and that everything was great. It was a great relief to here. I have felt great the past few days and just now I feel a little nauseous. I pray that I continue to feel well. I think what I am most leery about is telling everyone. I just don't want to. Isn't that weird! I pray that changes too!

February 20th, BLAH!

This morning, I woke up with a sore throat. Just what I need, huh? So far, today has been the most sluggish day. I feel so tired and crappy. I think it has to do with the cold symptoms I have but also the baby. I have yet to throw up, knock on wood. I'm so nervous it will get really bad, but I have read of woman who already can't keep things down and who don't even want to eat. I still have my appetite, more so than usual, and if I eat all the time throughout the day, the nausea seems to be somewhat contained. Again, knock on wood. I think today I just feel under the weather because of this cold or something like a cold I have picked up. I did look at more baby names today. I am still partial towards our few originals. We will see if those change, even though they haven't in years. It's crazy to think I can even be looking at names, but I still want to think about a lot more names. I have the time! I wish my first trimester was over. I wish my family and friends new and that was blown over, and I wish that I knew what this new miracle was inside of me! A lot of wishing! :) Today I just plan on hopefully running a few errands and relaxing with my husband tonight! :) Maybe I'll feel better tomorrow. I'm supposed to help Carrie with some things for Mayer. Do you know how hard it is to not tell your best friend who is pregnant that you’re pregnant? I just want to wait until he's here and she has had her moments! :) Did I mention I am still as nervous as ever to tell people? UGH I hate unwanted attention

March 7th, Feelings up Until Now.

I've been wanting to write about my feelings and what my body has been going through up until now and I am just now finding the time to do so. I will be 8 weeks on Monday. Richard and I go to our first ultrasound that day and get to see the "little one" and hear its heartbeat. We have been counting down the days until this. I think it will be even more real once we see and hear it. It will seem real then. As for the past four weeks, I haven't felt bad to my surprise. Since I've always been the one with the weak stomach, I figured I would be the misfortunate one who was always throwing up and have a miserable time. I even have a few friends who would always say how bad it would be for me. Ironically enough, knock on wood, it hasn't been bad at all. I have my moments where I feel sick to my stomach but as long as I never reach the hunger stage, I'm good. I've had to eat something every 2 hours to feel fine, but as long as I do that I'm not sick. I do feel exhausted and at times it will just take over me. I'm hoping that morning sickness won't just creep up on me after 8 weeks. I'm going to ask the doctor if she thinks that it will just appear. I'm just praying that I'll continue to feel this good. SHOCKED though that I feel remotely good. Blessed! Symptoms so far: 1. Extreme bloating to where I look pregnant. Here one day gone the next. 2. Moments of nausea that is dispersed with food. 3. Two moments of faintness/vomiting spells that did not happen. I think they were caused by waiting to long to eat breakfast and working out and getting to hot in the shower 4. Some dizziness 5. Overall exhaustion. 6. Sore breasts! 7. Discharge/two days at 4 weeks of brown spotting. Gone since. Not a worry though. Normal. 8. Moments of anxiousness about telling the family and carrying a baby. 9. Emotional lows and highs. Cry baby! 10. Dry mouth/stuffiness every morning. 11. Thirsty A LOT 12. Weird skin irritation. 12. Minimal crampiness. SO there you have it. My 8 weeks in a nut shell. Overall I feel surprisingly good. SO good that I won't believe there is a baby in there until I see it on Monday. Praying it all goes well.Carrie still hasn't had her baby. Don't want to tell anyone until she does. I still don't want to tell anyone period. I just loathe the attention and reactions. Scared for some weird reason. Not the reaction I thought I would have to getting pregnant. So we will see. Maybe after Monday I will feel better about telling everyone. I will wait on Mayer though. Maybe at 10 weeks.

March 9th, First Ultrasound

Today was out first ultrasound and it was amazing. I went in and actually had already gained 1 lb. I guess that is because I am eating every two hours so I don't get sick and am bloated. It seems to be subduing, the sickness, so I will sacrifice my body and gain a few lbs to stop from throwing up. Anyway, we went in and Richard got to meet Dr. McGuire. He loved her. I can't believe that she actually did the ultrasound and stayed with us in the room for so long. She treats me like I'm her only patient and I truly love that about her and her office. She is so caring and wonderful. I know I'm in good hands. Well she did my annual PAP before I got to preggo and then did my first ultrasound on my tummy. She showed us the baby and the heart beat. She said it was PERFECT baby. It had separated from the sack perfectly and had connected to me perfectly. The heartbeat was amazing to hear 156 beats per minute. Then she asked if I wanted a vaginal ultrasound because we could see the baby better. Of course I wanted too. We then saw the baby clear with little arm and leg buds starting to form and a perfect little 1.54 cm bean :). She laughed when she came in because she remembered me telling her that I wanted to get preggo in January and sure enough I did. She also laughed when she measured the baby crown to rump and he/she was exactly 8 weeks. My planning paid off. She also said it can take a healthy couple 8 months to conceive. So Richard and I are truly blessed. She answered my questions. Said I could eat lunch meat and travel and to relax and try exercising again after 12 weeks. She said to do yoga or palates to stretch myself out for labor. She was wonderful and we left carrying out first baby photos with us. Richard was so excited he could hardly stand it. He asks to see the pictures every night before we get in bed. I love him! He says he knows it’s a girl. I hope he’s right. But will be blessed with either or! ☺ I will write more soon. Glad the first apt went well. We are "planning" on telling next week!

The Pregnancy Story of "OurLittle One"

2009-03-16T09:28:00.008-05:00

In October of 2008, Richard and I decided to get off the pill. I spent three months preparing my body for conception. Preparing in a sense that I charted my cycles and started immediately on Folic Acid and Prenatal Vitamins. Once I realized that my cycles were normal and ovulation was easily chartable, we decided to start trying. So on the weekend of January the 23rd we began the process. I have to admit, during those three months I couldn't fathom the idea that we were going to make a baby. I went back and forth on the "Am I ready" thoughts, and we prayed a great deal about it. In no way was I ever scared to raise a child, just unsure about the whole process. I finally told the Lord that if it was his will we would get pregnant and in return had a great peace. I always had in the back of my mind that conception can take 6 months to a year for a healthy 25 year old, and I was never sure quite how long it would take me. Little did I know that the first time was a charm :).

I have to say that the anticipation after that weekend was unbearable. Having to wait two weeks to see if you are pregnant or not is really tough. You just worry about if it worked and are fearful of disappointment. It's all that is on your mind. I started having normal cramping around February 8th and 9th. I was supposed to start my period on Monday the 9th and it never came. On Wednesday I bought a package of test and decided that I would take one. The funny part was trying to pee on the stick. I felt like I was doing it all wrong. The first test I took came up negative. I was a little disappointed, and felt like I was let down but decided that if my period didn't come it wasn't going to come and if it did we would try again. I ran a few errands and when I came back decided to look at the test one more time and when I did there was a faint line across the pregnancy side. I got a little hopeful and decided to take one more test. Well I did, and it came up negative as well. So I decided to wait a few more days before I took the final test. My period never showed and on Friday I took the test. Richard was out and I set the video camera up and had it in my hands when he came it. He screamed "NO WAY" and reacted just how I thought he would. It was a sweet time.

So the secrecy began. We went to our first doctors appointment at 5 weeks and they drew what felt my liters of my blood and confirmed my pregnancy. I was reassured when they called that I was indeed in good health, O+, and my thyroid levels were perfect. Everything was on the right track. We waited three weeks until our 8 weeks appointment. During that time I was expecting myself to be super sick, but instead, I was pleasantly surprised. I have felt all the normal symptoms and side effects, but I have yet to get SICK! Knock on wood. Me, the one with the weak stomach who can't eat a lot of sugar, red meat, or cokes, hasn't gotten sick. It's very ironic. My doctor had even given me prescriptions for nausea pills, and I have yet to have to take one of them.

At our 8 week appointment we had our first ultrasound. We saw the little bean as I call it and got to hear the heart beat. 156 beats per minute. I will post a pic soon. It was a blessing and a comfort to see and hear that everything was ok. She told me that now would be a good time to tell everyone seeing that miscarriages drop to 5% after 8 weeks and hearing a healthy heartbeat. Richard and I left the doctors office thrilled. He was begging to tell the world, but I wanted to make sure Carrie had Mayer and her time wasn't stolen by our news.

Carrie had Mayer early Monday morning and we told both our parents Monday night. We bought them each a baby outfit and a picture of the ultrasound. We played it off as being an anniversary gift for my parents. They were so shocked and unbelievably happy. We caught it all on video. It was perfect. Richard's parents came over later that night and we showed them what we got our parents and they were beyond floored to. We called the extended family to. My favorite two reactions were from my aunt and Richard's grandfather Henry. My mom told my aunt that we had given her an ultrasound to which my aunt responded "Oh great, of what?" Henry also said "Are you telling me your wife is expecting?" They were thrilled once it clicked but those were by far priceless reactions.

The news has been quickly spreading since. We told all our friends and I will never forget each of their reactions. The scream out load from Jenny in Subway. The screaming through the phone from Jess and her nervous knotted stomach all night at bunco, the "I just am so excited" from Carrie one hundred times, and oh the "I am crying, bless my heart" from Casey. Everyone's reactions were sweet and perfect. I must even say a few people were pretty good with their intuitions. Claiming they new way in advance. Its been exciting and a little overwhelming, but I am thankful that so many people are happy for us! And more than thankful that the news is out! So the journey begins! :)

Below is a post of all the journal entries I had before I blogged. Just a step by step journey. I want to have this so my friends who will be getting pregnant sooner than later can see how it feels. It was a pretty lonely time there for a while. So this is mainly for my memories and for my friends. :)

Lessons Learned

2008-04-04T10:40:00.002-05:00

The past two weeks have completely taught me new things about myself. Before my surgery, I was consumed with fear, doubt, and worry. I knew in the back of mind that the surgery would be over, I would recover, and all the worry and fear would have been wasted for nothing, but non the less, I still let myself get caught in that snare of fear. Now, almost two weeks later I have learned my lesson, and many more. Fear has been the most negative characteristic of my being for a while, and I still struggle with it, but these past two weeks have changed me. I've learned that my situations will not be any better, no matter how much effort I put into worrying and fearing over them. I've learned that that fear only destroys you and pulls you down. I've learned that fear can consume you to believe almost anything other than what you know you should be believing. I worried for a year over a surgery that lasted 40 minutes. I've learned to admire people who have the ability to not let fear creep in to their beings. Some people's mind's never go to that place. They are always confident and always sure that the situations they are in will work out no matter what the circumstances. I have learned that I am to quick to become anxious, and I have learned that God's peace is amazing.

I had a dream the night before last. Of course I have been on a strong antibiotic for the past few days and I believe it has interrupted my sleeping greately, meaning that my dreams have been very odd. The only dream I remember to detail was short, but unbelievably real. I remember having this great fear in my heart. In my dream, Richard and I were in bed sleeping just as we were doing. All of a sudden, I opened my eyes and felt the presence of a demon entering our room. I can't describe it to you in any other way. I was encompassed with fear and new exactly what was coming towards me. Although there was nothing physically present, I knew it was entering our bedroom door. Our dog, immediately stood up her back two legs as if she had sensed someone had entered the room. The fear was unexplainable and the only thing that came out of my mouth was "Get out of here, in the name of my Lord Jesus." Without another thought, I literally woke up and the peace that they say surpasses all understanding, surpassed me. I wasn't the least bit scared, and I didn't think about the dream itself until I woke up yesterday. I truly believe that dreams aren't something that are just imagined. I think dreams are thoughts that we have conjured up in our beings. Our restlessness is often revealed and lived through what we dream. All of that to say, I truly feel that the Lord wanted me to see that fear could easily be released with him beside me. He is living in me! What should I fear? The dream truly spoke to me, and I because of it and my experiences the past two weeks, I have learned a great deal about fear and anxiousness. No matter how bad things seem, the Lord is right there beside you and knows the outcome. I've needed to learn that lesson for a long time. These two weeks have made me braver and stronger, and I am thankful for them!

Monotony

2008-03-31T16:24:00.003-05:00

Here I sit, a week after surgery. Still sitting and laying, sitting and laying. My house has reached its dirtiest. Well, according to me its dirtiest. I guess to others it still might be semi-clean. I've watched as many HGTV shows that could possibly air, and I am reaching the decorating point of no return. I've found myself contemplating my "style" and trying to figure out what I can do next in my own house. I guess that what's you get for lying around for a week. I wish I could just be complacent. At some point you have to be satisfied right? I guess not. Not in this country where style and greed control everything. That's another blog right? For now I'm just battling nausea, acute pain, and boredom.

Sitting here has humbled me. It has made me thankful for my husband. You wouldn't believe how wonderfully he has taken care of me. He has never left my side during any of this. He works so hard for us and yet still makes me feel unbelievably loved. It makes me thankful for my heavenly father as well.

I guess this blog really had no point other than its title. I'm just bored. Bored, but thankful!

Enduring Pain

2008-03-29T12:53:00.002-05:00

Enduring pain has been my trial for the week. After overcoming the fear of surgery, I've had to overcome the pain that follows it. The surgery itself was easy. It was nothing for me to lay in the chair and get slowly put to sleep. It was nothing for me simply because I didn't remember anything until Richard carried me to the bed. After I realized what had happened, the pain set in. After throwing up blood, bleeding for 24 hours, and being in a constant spaced out state, I realized just how traumatic the experience really was. I think everyone was being nice when they said "It's nothing" "You'll be fine"! I guess it's different for everyone. Here it is Saturday, five days after surgery, and I am still not feeling like myself. I have had to go back to the doctor twice and get three of my teeth or hole's packed because of dry sockets. Right now I am not in "pain" but I am uncomfortable with an aching and constant sense of pressure in my mouth, not to mention that the left side of my bottom lip is still numb. Needless to say, I have overcome my fear of surgery. I do not however wish this experience upon anyone else. The one thing I have learned after all this is that I am ready for labor! If I can go through this crying intense bloody pain for a week, I can certainly undergo labor with DRUGS! I guess it just has taught me that life has experiences that aren't necessarily enjoyable and that in two weeks, hopefully this will just be a thing of the past.

Why Blog?

2008-03-19T09:42:00.002-05:00

I don't know if anyone will ever read these blogs other than myself. I don't think I would even want people to read them. I've always loved to write, and I have every since I was little. I guess that's why I feel the Lord wants me to write books, but I've never been one to openly share my deepest thoughts. I would often write them down, but not in "blog" sense. It seems that when I do write them, I feel better about them. So the purpose of my blogs are simply to release my inner self at times when I don't know what else to do. I always feel better after I write. In a way, writing detoxes the thoughts that often cloud my insides. All that to say. . . . I blog for myself. For my own personal release of emotion, and more times than none, it makes me feel free.

Beating the Devil

2008-03-19T09:10:00.004-05:00

As trivial as it may seem, I am having oral surgery on Monday. I know it seems as if it's just a surgery to some, but I've truly struggled with anxiety and fear over the situation. But through the dread, I've learned that the devil's greatest snare's in my life are all associated around "what ifs"! These what ifs revolve around my constant fears that often seem absurd and never truly play out. So, I've been "coaching" myself if you will, to be strong and dependent upon the Lord for this circumstance. I'm hoping that I go into this with a confidence in my doctor and with a confidence that my God will be with me through it all. In a way, I want this to be a learning experience for myself. I want my faith to over power my fears. People always say to turn everything over to the Lord. I have to admit, I've had a hard time doing that in the past. No matter how hard I pray and and ask the fears to be taken away, they still plague my emotions and thoughts. I guess I've never realized how to completely release and trust the one who already knows the outcome and who would never leave me. So in a way, I'm praying that this surgery is a self renewing experience. One that allows me to see the strength the Lord can give and one that finally allows me the chance to completely turn something over depending utterly upon my faith! Not only will I loose the nagging literal pain within my mouth, but I will loose the fear that has been nagging me for the past year, and as a result, I will get out of the snares that the devil has bound me in. So I'm taking this situation head on, leaving the devil, with my snares, behind!!